FAN: Suicide IS The Answer

I don't feel passionately about suicide one way or the other. I don't think you should do it over a member of the opposite sex, but if you want to whack yourself...who am I to say you shouldn't? HOWEVER, if anyone on the planet should commit suicide....it's this guy.

FAN: Still A Fan The Early Years V

This is from Christmas 1973. It looks like the big gifts that year were the GI Joe Camper/RV and the Verti Bird. The camper wasn't made out of plastic either. That's metal. Most likely it had some lead in it too. They were indestructible as I recall. I had this one too, but I liked the metal one better. Even though it was for Big Jim, we considered it a Joe toy. I can't remember if the RV was Tonka or not or if it was for GI Joe specifically. One year my neighbor and I got reamed by his Dad because we both drove our campers through his new tomato plants (the jungle!). His garden was his life and he didn't appreciate it at all. I thought the helicopter toy was called "whirly bird" instead of Verti but another picture showed the box. That toy was badass.
Here we see yet another precursor into adulthood as I rock this 3 piece kit. I wonder how long it lasted before I broke those heads? I'm guessing you can't buy toy drum heads after you crack one. The cymbals look like recycled pie pans. Am I crazy or is that a little wood block or cowbell on top? I need MORE COWBELL!
There's nothing significant about this picture at Niagara Falls from 1974. That's me, Still A Sis and Still A Dad on the Canadian side, eh. The thing that caught my attention was the railing. Was it really below the waist of a 6 year old or is this somehow trick photography from a weird angle? I remember going to the museums up there with all the barrel people and I thought a lot about falling over those falls as a kid. I didn't even want to take the cable car ride across because I was sure it would fall. That railing looks like it is WAY too easy to just topple over. If you could get your wife to turn her head for just a second you could give her a little bump. If there is nothing right below that I can't believe Still A Dad allowed us up on it.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is a poor man's Batman costume. This was taken in our house but I clearly remember putting this outfit together at my Aunt Laverne's. Batman's getup was mostly black and dark blue so of course I chose green pajamas to start. No boots? No problem. Just give me some Wonder white bread bags and two "gumbands". Yes, I used to say "gumbands" and it was a hard habit to break when I moved east. Nevermind that it cut off my circulation, I was Batman! For a mask I chose a modified grocery bag. Most likely an A&P since she worked there. So there I am with a bag on my head. For a cape we used a towel with a safety pin right on my adam's apple. Today that might be considered dangerous. In 1974, wearing extremely slippery bread bags on your feet with a safety pin on your throat was child's play. The chest symbol is the most authenticate looking piece to this kit. I wonder if I was the dark brooding Batman or the campy Adam West version? I'm guessing campy.

FAN: Roethlisberger's DNA Not Needed?

I'm so confused about the Roethlisberger incident. SI.com is now running a story that the police are no longer seeking Roethlisberger's DNA. I'm not quite sure what to make of this. All I know is, on the surface it sounds good for Ben. As Still A While said who tipped me, he is one lucky bastard if this eventually goes away. I happen to be firmly in Stilladog's corner with his prdering of events. Something happened that was consentual, it ended badly, she was drunk and/or embarassed and her friends convinced her something really bad happened or she didn't want to be seen as some celebrity bopper.

That's my guess and nothing more. I stand by my statements made here and on That's Church's website that if he is found guilty I will come down on him hard. If not, I chalk it up to I don't know what. I want to believe him and I want to like him but reading everything that I've read recently - it's hard to find any positives. John Steigerwald's post really paints him poorly and that's from a Pittsburgh journalist.

So, I don't think it means much since he admitted to sexual contact so we'll still wait and see. If no charges are filed, or charges are filed and he's innocent - what do we have? We have a QB who wins and is apparently a jerk. Is that bad? I don't know. Rex Grossman is prbably a swell guy, but he can't play football. If Ben sexually assaulted that girl, the game changes. I'm saying what if he didn't. I can live with a hard partying QB who wins even if he is a tool, and I'm not calling him a tool. I personally know someone who was at the PNH video shoot which starred Ben a few years ago. He told me the next time I saw him that he was an @$$hole, but I chose not to believe it because the guy isn't a Steeler's fan.

If he is only guilty of being a jerk, suit him up and thorw him out there. I tend to believe most pro athletes probably are and they only change when the cameras are on them and they do charity not because they really want to but because they feel pressure to. Of course that isn't true of everyone, but I bet for every Troy, there are 25 jerkoffs. If our jerkoff can win two more Super Bowls, I'll keep him.

FAN: Working From Home

WFH means Ice Cream Sandwiches for a mid morning snack. Mmmmmmm ice cream sandwiches.
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DOG: Fan = Snake Lover!

Don't be fooled by what you see below. Still A. Fan loves snakes like a bull-hog loves his slop!

FAN: Snake Killer

Let it be know to all serpents...you sun yourself on Still A Fan's rocks, you will die.
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DOG: Blogging As Therapy

I'm having a rough time this morning and they say that sometimes writing about what's bothering you is good therapy. So I'm going to tell you a story and share my feelings if you'll indulge me.

I am a little unnerved because today is the day an old friend of mine is being buried. It's not that he's dead that bothers me. We all have to die some day and I understand we can't be here forever. Who's life is so great you'd want to be here forever anyway? But it's how my friend died that is troubling me.

My friend was a fellow named Steve Asid. Steve was brutally murdered at 11am Tuesday morning while working from home in his own house. From what I can gather, blown away with a shotgun in his family room. His fiancee's ex-husband blasted his way into the house with said 12-gauge via a sliding glass door and shot Steve dead then turn the gun on himself. A murder-suicide. You can read about it here but the news story is being carried by all the Mid-Atlantic newspapers from Richmond to Philadelphia.

Steve was just a few years younger than me. We first met when we were both young professionals back in the mid-80s. Steve worked for a major cash register franchise and I was a retail systems analyst. Steve represented my vendor and was absolutely great to work with. He taught me a lot of stuff about programming cash registers and credit card equipment. And even later when we went to a new retail system that used IBM registers, I still rented equipment from him for "tent sales" or as we called them travelling circuses. So over a period of roughly ten years he and I worked together from time to time. He'd come to my office sometimes, and other times I'd go to his. Even though we never really socialized outside of work we became friends.

Now I don't know much about his assailant. Sounds like this guy had various gun charges on him currently and some other arrests in the past. But the thing is, he was supposed to be on "house arrest" but he didn't qualify for an ankle braclet monitor! How the fuck can that happen? What good are restraining orders and house arrests when these people go out and commit more crimes anyway? Our society is truly fucked up when it comes to this kind of thing.

From what I have learned, Steve worked a couple days a week from home and apparently his fiancee's ex either stalked him or knew which days he'd be home. In any event he found what he was looking for... or maybe not.

To add an even more odd twist to this story, Steve's 9 year-old son was killed on December 31 by a falling Hickory tree while on a school sponsored trip to a nature area specifically designed to educate kids about the environment and ecology etc.

Now I haven't seen or talked to Steve in about 14-15 years. But when somebody you've been close to and left on friendly terms dies suddenly and tragically it makes you reflect back on your own life. Steve could have been any of us. And any of us could have been him. Life is fragile my friends. Live every day in a way that you'll have no regrets if it is your last.

FAN: Still A Fan The Early Years IV

This is Christmas 1972. You see the giant football is bigger than my head. I included this pic because it shows some awesome 70's toys. See the can of Tinker Toys? A Slinky? Those two cars were so cool, I forget the name of the toy but they were sold with the ramps you see there as well. You pulled a plastic cord and the cars took off. When they hit, the doors and stuff would fly off as they were all controlled by a tab on the front. It may have been called "Demolition Derby" or something. Ok, I cheated and went to Google....check this out! And what Christmas wouldn't be complete in Western PA without an assault rifle? Is that an AR? A Tommy Gun? Also, my first Big Wheel. It debuted in 1969 according to Wikipedia. I'm surprised the wiki doesn't mention all the excitement over the model that was later introduced with the side brake for spin-outs. Anyone ever own a Green Machine?
My one great aunt spoiled me to death. My maternal grandmother's sister lived right beside my grandmother and was married to Uncle "Chew". She picked me up from school almost every Thursday. She worked at the local A&P (grocery chain) and got some promotional items that she would give me. I thought I was so bad-ass walking around with that gum box! That was my second dog "Penny". Like I said, living on a highway was dangerous for dogs and Happy didn't last long. Penny didn't either. We lived close to a West Penn Power plant and I remember very clearly that Penny escaped our yard and went out walking around. WPP was on strike and there was a group of strikers sitting around at a local corner. We were walking the block screaming for the dog. A lady on strike with no compassion whatsoever said "Are you looking for a dog, I hit one earlier this morning over there" and pointed to the brush along the road. How traumatic as a kid to watch your Dad scoop the dog up and carry it home....crying like crazy walking behind him. Penny ended up where a lot of other things ended up in our yard....."behind the hedges" in a hole. I'm not crying, I just have something in my EYE.
This picture is the reason my daughter is allowed to buy whatever costume she wants for Halloween, damn the cost. My mom had two boxes of Halloween mish mash items in the back of my sister's closet. I clearly remember one of the boxes being for this company. Every year, two weeks or so before Halloween, we would go upstairs, pull the boxes out and decide what we were going to be. If I ran 10 pictures in a row of my Halloween outfits, you would quickly see that I was either a hobo, an Indian, a skeleton or a clown. The clown and hobo were also interchangeable as you see here by me on the left. It was basically just masks and you added some other stuff to it. A blanket for the Indian, etc. She also had a few wigs in the box. We could never just wear a mask. You had to wear a wig so nobody could recognize you by your hair. While it was very exciting to pull the boxes out every year to see what you would be, by the time I was 10 or so, I was damn good and tired of being the same things every year. At one point a funky black hat was added that our Uncle "Chick" picked up at an auction. We added some fake teeth as well. We'll see those pictures here eventually. I love Halloween and want to pass that love on to Still A Stroke and I think I did - not just for the candy but it's cool...and dark...cue the Rob Zombie music!

FAN: Wash That Stank Off

No, this is not a Tiger or Ben post although I get it if you think it is. I was picking up my shirts at the local dry cleaner's and I was shooting the shit with the owner. An older gentleman walked in and by older I just mean older than me (41). I'm guessing he was Stilladog + 5 years of age. The girl said "....and how do you like your shirts again?". He said and I kid you not - "heavy heavy heavy starch." Wow. I guess he likes that tight polished look, good for him. Then he continued.... "yes, that way I can wear them four times before I need to bring them back."

Dude. Do not bring "the funk" into the work place. It's the worst. We expect it from some. Heck I work with a guy who I swear smells like he ate a 14" salami right before coming to my desk, but for all that is good and holy, please do everything you can not to smell at work. Four days? With a nice crisp shirt? I will give you two if it's heavy material and doesn't wrinkle. I have a few oxfords like that. But even still, I'm not a fan of putting on a shirt that I've already worn to work one day. I get dressed at 6:00 and undressed at 5:00. That's eleven hours.

Don't get me wrong - I'll wear the same exact hoodie Monday evening through Friday evening after work. I wore the same t-shirt on Sunday working in the bathroom that I already wore all day Saturday working in there. It's not about that, it's about the audience. I've worn jeans that can almost stand up on their own, but not to work. Come on, dude.

FAN: Shoot'em Up

One day at work last week my boss asked me to lunch. Little did I know at the time that lunch was shooting his Kimber 45 at a range. It's the first time I've pulled a trigger since 1995. I didn't do too bad. Wii must help. I bought a box of ammo and did half at 25 feet and half at 35 feet. I only missed the body once and that was on a head shot.

Still A Dad, you stll got that .357 somewhere?
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FAN: Choice?

Last bite of grape Tootsie Pop into Tootsie Roll or last bite of cherry BlowPop into bubble gum?

I think I will go with cherry into gum!
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DOG: What Are You Listening To Now? #15

OK. This time I'm going to try something different. I'm going to post the album covers for the recordings I've been listening to most since the last one of these segments. Let me know in the comments what you think of the new format and of course what you've been listening to also.


#10-I'm going to start off with Albert Collins - Live at Montreaux. I had to dig up some Albert after exchanging stories with Bluzdude over at Darwinfish 2 about "The Master of the Telecaster" as well as here on the Slant. This was one of the last albums he recorded before his death from cancer. What can I say? It's typical high quality, hard-working, Albert Collins blues.



#9-Next up is Allan Holdsworth - Metal Fatigue. This is an old album from the mid-80s. I'd guess most would categorize this as jazz fusion or progressive rock. I'm not much for pigeon-holing artists into genres so I just call this 'jazz.' I have a few Allan Holdsworth albums and while I think they all have some merit, I think I like this particular one best. Regardless of what genre you put him in he's one hell of a guitarist.


#8-Coming in at 8 is what is assaulting my ears right now as I write this, Popa Chubby - The Fight Is On. This is the latest album, a 2010 release, from Chubby. By and large he fits into Blues (here we go with genres again) but this album is far from it. Oh, there's some blues on here but mostly this is a rocker. Popa Chubby is a guy Fan asked me about quite some time ago. At that time I had heard of him but was most unfamiliar with his music. Shortly after I discovered a blues guitarist, Bill Perry who I thought was great. Perry and Popa Chubby were buddies and I believe Popa Chubby even produced a few of Bill Perry's albums. So I started to check out Popa Chubby's own releases. Now his sound has grown on me over time to the point that I really like him.

#7-Norton Buffalo & The Knockouts - King of the Highway. I first became aware of harpist Norton Buffalo back in the 70s when he was part of Commander Cody & The Lost Planet Airmen. He also was a longstanding member of the Steve Miller Band. Anyway he knocked me out with some terrific solos on the Commander Cody album 'We Got A Live One Here.' But I never heard of him much again until he started collaborating with slide guitarist Roy Rogers (not the cowboy singer). And those albums are pretty good. But this one is REAL good. It's a band of Buffalo's own assembly. Just a whole lot of good time music on this one. Norton Buffalo was a highly respected musician among musicians. But sadly, he died only one month after being diagnosed with cancer last year.



#6-Lucky Peterson - Beyond Cool. Lucky Peterson is a multi-instrumental talent mostly known for sessions he's done with blues, soul, and R&B artists. I had been hearing about how good he is for years but had been missing the boat with my Lucky Peterson CD purchases. Until this past year when I first discovered his Move album. Then I came across Black Midnight Sun. And this one is outstanding as well. It's got elements of all his background, blues, R&B and a little bit of soul. As usual he plays both keyboards and guitar and is great on both.

#5-Curtis Salgado - Soul Activated. Curtis is the consummate band leader, singer and harpist although his harp playing is minimal these days. Former lead singer for Roomful of Blues, he's also a cancer survivor thanks to a timely transplant. (If you've gotten this far you're probably tired of me listing guys who died of cancer anyway). I just saw him play on the Blues Cruise. He wasn't a priority of mine to see, but I befriended a fellow named Doug James who picked up a gig playing bari sax for Curtis for the cruise. Doug plays with Duke Robillard as his regular gig but sat in with numerous acts on the cruise. So I went to hear Doug, and Curtis blew me away. Saw him play twice. So I went back to the Curtis Salgado albums I already had and started listening again. Then I found this one (and a couple others). They're all good but this is the one I'm listening to right now.

#4-Chris Cain - Live at The Rep. Chris Cain is probably the best blues guitarist you never heard of. I have a number of his studio albums and this live one blows them all away. He has a very unique singing voice and is a terrific guitar player. He is reminiscent of a white BB King if that makes any sense at all. From what I can gather, this album was cut in San Jose, CA at the dedication of some hall out there for the performing arts called The Rep. If you get a chance to give this one a listen I think you'll come away from it liking both the music and the man.

#3-The Kentucky Headhunters - Big Boss Man. I've been a fan of the Kentucky Headhunters since I first heard them in either late 1990 or early 1991. But they had some personnel changes over the years and although they started out with videos on CMT I don't think record companies ever knew how to market them. So they kinda fell off the face of my earth. This album was released in 2005 and by the looks of the cover most of the original band has returned. This one is a perfect blend for me. It's got elements of blues, rock, and country on there and it's all great. I'd say this might be their best album to date. Got to love the dog on the drums too!

#2-Billy Price & Fred Chapellier - Night Work. Those of you from Pittsburgh will undoubtedly recognize the name Billy Price. Billy first came to prominence as the lead singer for the late great Roy Buchanan back in the early 70s. But most of you will know him as the leader of Billy Price & The Keystone Rhythm Band. I mentioned Fred Chapellier quite a few WAYLT segments ago when I was listening to his Roy Buchanan tribute album. So you see there's an obvious Buchanan connection between these two. This is a duet album that really compliments what both artist brings to the table. So many times this is not the case. It's a nice fit for these guys and I hope they collaborate on more albums in the future. If you check this one out please give special attention to Champagne Blues And Pittsburgh Soul. This track encapsulates my whole review.

#1-And the number one album I'm listening to and can't seem to get enough of is... The Caribbean Jazz Project - Afro Bop Alliance (although their first album just called Caribbean Jazz Project gets played a lot too). The combination of vibes, saxophone, and steel drums appealed to me as did the mixture of Afro, Cuban Salsa, and Bop jazz. Then I saw that Paquito D'Rivera was the saxophonist for the group. Well, then I had to check it out. And now 5 Caribbean Jazz Project albums later I found that I just love these guys. You could load up these 5 albums up on your iPod or Sonos system and have a Caribbean cookout on your patio with rum drinks all around and some jerk chicken on the grill and it'd beat the living shit out of the Jimmy Buffet music people typically put on for those type of gatherings.

FAN: I Want Biblical Justice

I literally live 2 throws of a football from Bucks county. I have a good friend who is a teacher at Council Rock HS. I'm glad this piece of shit is going to jail. I also hope he gets a whole new experience while he serves his term. Taking advantage of kids is one of the best ways to fire me up. The priests and teachers that do it are sick individuals. I don't want to rehabilitate them. I want to remove them from the planet. My daughter is 10. I don't care is she's 10, 13 or 17 - if I was the father in this situation - I would grill up a nice rare steak, have a nice vodka on the rocks with a lemon twist, go to my basement and get my 22 ounce hammer, get in my car, crank up some gangsta rap, drive to this guy's house, call 911, then beat him to within an inch of his life. Why not kill him? Because if the jury has mercy on me and they might based on the situation, it would give him a chance to recover. Then I could wait a year or so and plan round #2. Turn the other cheek? Nah, an eye for an eye. Old Testament.

FAN: Still A Fan The Early Years III

I'll open with this picture of Easter 1971 so you can see the drastic difference with how my mother dressed me. This outfit makes so much sense for me. Look at the little bow-tie! I was rockin a bow-tie in 1971 people! I like the jacket too. It's a cool little outfit, something I might still go for today as I like retro type shirts and stuff. My wardrobe consists today of about 15 different "bowling" shirts like Charlie Harper wears. Doesn't it look like Still A Sis is watching me as I look into her basket to make sure the candy division was equal? The garage behind us belonged to our neighbor and it always fascinated me as a kid. He was a local vending operator and had all kinds of junked pinball machines in there. Should a ball find it's way in there, I was careful to take my time while I looked around. I clearly remember an old bowling game being in there. I wanted that sucker so bad. Behind me you can see a train trestle which eventually lead me to name my 11 year fantasy football franchise The West Side Trestle Trolls.
That's my first dog, Happy. I really have little recollection of Happy and I'm not even sure if the dog was male or female. Sadly, living on a highway was not so good for owning a dog. Happy didn't last too long. Also notice the garbage cans are inside the yard. They used to enter the yard, take them to the truck then put your cans back. Ha! Try that today.
Christmas 1971. Hey man, if you don't have a fireplace, just buy one made of cardboard. That's tight! Look at the foil behind the dancing flames. You put an orange light bulb back there and it's a party. Think they don't make those any longer? Think again.
There's really no reason to whip this picture out except to talk about wardrobes again. Still A Dad, what was the fascination with covering my ears? It's April 1972, not February 1972. Did I leak at the ears or something? Did they stick out so far that you were trying to push them in? Minus the hat I can't really complain. There's my best man again, Still A Colt. I have two comments about his clothes. I freaking LOVE that sweater. Give me an XL and I'll wear that to work on Monday as it's all me. If My daughter saw that in those colors, she'd buy it for me as she knows how much I like stuff like that. Now the second point....the pants??? I'm not sure you could find a pair of pants and a sweater that didn't go together worse than this combo. I'm going to go ahead and give you an A++ for the sweater and an epic FAIL on the pants. Maybe in the fall whip those out with a brownish sweater. I can't tell if Still A Sis is wearing a hat too or if that's part of my grandmother's dress. Between the sidewalk we're on and the white house below where Uncle "Chew" and Aunt Vernie lived we had some epic whiffle ball games. Another great uncle of mine shot Estes rockets off there. I was there practically every weekend of my life until I started working on weekends. The road in the background goes to Stilladog's childhood house, maybe 2 miles away. To this day he owns another property where his dad used to live about 2 miles from where this was taken in the other direction.
This photo captures a lot. First, that's a decent looking house built out of Lincoln Logs for a 3 1/2 year old. This was 1972 and I thought I'd do a quick search to see when Lincoln Logs were first sold. I was guessing the 50's. I'd be wrong. Look at the tv kiddies. That sucker might be black-n-white, I can't remember. I especially like the radio in the background. Very retro. I'd drop one of those on my office desk just for the cool look. It's amazing how many pictures my sister and I have of our childhood. A lot of people don't so props go out (up) to Still A Mom. As you get older you realize how priceless these are.

DOG: Cut To The Chase

With so much crap being spewed and speculated upon in the case of our Quarterback, I felt an obligation to cut through all the bullshit that's being reported and tell you what really happened last Thursday night / Friday morning when the devil went down to Georgia.

First a disclaimer: I wasn't there so I know even less about what actually happened than even Willie Colon who I will furthermore refer to as Sgt. "I know nothing" Schultz. I am basing the rest of this article on what has been reported thus far and my extensive experience in bar room situations. Those run the gamut from barroom brawls, gangbangs, black marketing of stolen chainsaws, conspiracy to commit insurance fraud, and of course drug trafficking.

So Ben is out with Sgt. Schultz and a few other friends in Georgia continuing to celebrate his birthday. A bunch of local college sorority girls start following him around from bar to restaurant to bar etc. Finally late in the evening they find themselves at the Capital City nightclub where Ben and entourage are seated in the VIP section. Drinking alcohol has occurred all along the way by all parties involved except for 2 police officers Ben brought with him down from PA as bodyguards.

These sorority girls anxious for a look at why the call him "Big" Ben (other than the obvious size of an NFL player) join Ben's group in the partially secluded VIP section. As the evening progresses Ben is approached by a very interested co-ed, Ben goes with her back to a secluded hallway and into an employee rest room not in used by the regular clientele. You want to know what happened next right?

Probably started out with some swapping of DNA right off the bat (kissing). One thing leads to another and this drunken girl gets the answer to her question and see why they call him "Big" Ben. So she starts kissing Big Ben below the belt. But she's so damn drunk that two things happen and I'm not sure of the order but it probably doesn't matter. She falls over (haven't we all done that a time or two after having one or five too many?) and whacks her head on a sink, toilet, paper towel dispenser (oops, this Ben, not Reed), whatever. And she realizes she is too drunk and/or hurt to consummate the deal. Either way Ben thinks 'OK this bitch is too drunk to give me a fellatio lesson. I'm going back in with my boys.'

The young lady takes offense to being left in a dark restroom with a boo-boo on her noggin. While her friends go see what's happened. It's then that the shitstorm starts to brew. They convince her she needs medical attention and she ends up at a hospital. Then they convince her that Ben Roethlisberger whacked her over the head cause she wouldn't suck his dick. And by the way, he's worth $100 million. So by golly she's entitled to some of that dough on account of what he did to her! They must not have been seniors. Surely by senior year every sorority sister in America has learned the golden rule of oral sex ... No Deposit No Return (same as at the bank). Why this never happened to Jed Clampett I don't know. But Jane Hathaway did work at a bank!

So over a simple blow job that went a bit awry on account of alcohol, millions of Stiller fans have had their lives disrupted once again because of the shenanigans of our QB. To say nothing of the actual Stiller players and front office personnel who should be focusing on the upcoming draft.

I don't think the Milledgeville Police Department should be looking for their K-9 unit from Roethlisberger any time soon unless they decide there's not enough evidence to charge him. As Mike Tomlin would say, "Calling off the dogs, if you will."

I'm convinced something very similar to this is what actually happened. It wasn't very smart on the part of Roethlisberger. But I don't think he's a monster and sexual predator either. The young lady wasn't very smart either. And at this stage I bet she's regretting taking the advice of her equally drunken girlfriends.

This thing could get much uglier before it's all said and done. Big Ben has hired a private investigator to dig up shit on his accuser and her friends. So that may help bring this thing to a head sooner rather than later. It must be wonderful to have unlimited resources to come to your aid when you screw up. Anyway, I'll be very surprised if, once we know the truth, it doesn't come out very close to this scenario. If I'm wrong, either the facts aren't being reported accurately yet, or my experience is beginning to fail me. If I'm right we can call it The Knob-Job Heard Across The (Steeler) Nation. And if you're a Stiller fan, you better hope I'm right.

Now you know with 90% accuracy that there's not going to be much here when the smoke clears. So let's stop worrying about our Quarterback and focus on who the next new Stillers are going to be.

FAN: Second Helping

The tosser of the best pass in Super Bowl XL has returned to the Stillers. I hope it works out. On paper, I'm not sure why we did it. Was it a knee-jerk reaction tot he Shitbirds signing Stallworth and Boldin? If so, I don't think we scared anybody. I like him as receiver #4, but if he takes snaps away from Wallace, then I'm good and pissed off. Hines is old, folks. The future is Tone and Wallace. Wallace needs to play as much as possible.

If he's here for kick returns or punt returns - I thought Logan was really good last year - much better than ARE towards the end of his Steeler run when I thought he danced way too much instead of taking yardage when it was there. I don't know, maybe I hold a grudge that he even left the first time. We did offer him a contract if memory serves.

I read an article that said we also contacted Larry Foote. Did anyone else read that? Weird. Usually when we say "bye" we're getting younger. I'm glad Ryan Clark stayed but I hope we didn't overpay. We have a bunch of big name players making big name money. We need to fill those other slots with lower salaries than the reported 4 mil for Ryan. He is an intimidator though and I love that. Maybe the contract is structured in the team's favor. We'll see. I'm not surprised by Clark coming back but I am surprised about the other 3 signings. I was glad to see the salaries of Battle and Allen as they were relatively low.

DOG: Debbie Davies - 2002 ...etcetera

Debbie Davies - Freedom Blues Fest 2002

Over at the Darwinfish 2 blog, our buddy, Bluzdude, has been posting a series of very interesting (to me anyway) stories regarding his chance meetings with the famous and almost famous. Please take a moment to check them out. We also link to him over on the right.

In his latest chapter he tells about meeting the late great Albert Collins, "The Master of the Telecaster." He's posted some vintage photos of Albert's performance out there too. And in one of them he mentions that I would recognize Debbie Davies as Albert's 2nd guitarist. And I certainly did. Ironically, Debbie Davies, is a performer with whom I have had a chance meeting!

I posted a comment on his blog which outlines the basic facts of our encounter but I wanted to go into more depth with the story and didn't want him to feel like I was hi-jacking his story. So I'll go into more depth about both Debbie and Albert here.

The Freedom Blues Fest & Chili Cookoff was an event held outside of Cumberland, MD for only two years, far as I know. 2001 and 2002. It was sponsored by the Potomac Blues Society which I fear is also gone now. Mrs. Dog and I (well, she wasn't Mrs. Dog back then -just wished she was) used to love to go up there because it's out in the mountains, it combined the blues and chili -which are a couple of our favorite diversions- and even though none of my family lives there anymore, I have family roots in Cumberland... same as Still A Fan.

In 2002 there were lots of good blues acts over the course of the weekend. Dave Hole, the great slide guitarist from Australia, The Nighthawks, and Debbie Davies. We went up Friday night to hear the Nighthawks only to have their set cut short by a nasty thunderstorm.

On Saturday morning we had breakfast in the hotel. Afterward I was just wandering around the lake and golf course killing time until the festival resumed in the early afternoon. I saw a tour bus pull up and assumed one of the acts had just arrived. Turned out to be the Debbie Davies Band. Didn't really think much of it so I went back to the room to see how soon Mrs. Dog would be ready. She was just getting out of the shower and it was almost noon. So I decided to go to the bar to see if I could catch the Steelers preseason game vs. the Lions. I was hoping Tommy Maddox would win the QB position from Kordell Stewart so I wanted to see him do well.

As I was leaving my room I saw a diminutive lady looking all lost and checking each door number. Then I realized it was Debbie Davies herself. So I asked, "Are you Debbie?" She replied that she was. So I introduced myself and asked what she was looking for. She told me she couldn't find her room, #210. So I casually mentioned that a room number beginning with a 2 was probably located on the second floor and that we were on the first floor. I took her to the second floor and she found 210 from there.

Her set was easily the best that day from my perspective. I happened to have a couple of her CDs in my truck so after she finished I got her to sign them for me and we BS'd a little more. She told me how important it was for Albert Collins to have given her a break by hiring her to play in his band. She spoke very highly of Albert. I said that I had not had the good fortune to ever meet Albert Collins. Then she added that he was as good a person as he was a musician.

Now back in January you will recall a post of mine summarizing my trip on the 2010 Rhythm & Blues Cruise. And in there I mentioned a couple of the a sizzling sets turned in by Duke Robillard. Well in the second one, Duke played an Albert Collins tune, the Dying Flu Blues. And to introduce it he told of a conversation he had with Albert not long before he passed away. Albert said, "Take care of yourself, Duke. There's only a few of us left." Albert knew he was about to go. And he said that Albert "burned down the house" that night. So when Duke got into Dyin' Flu, it was like he channeled the spirit of Albert Collins right down to his fingertips. I can honestly say I have never seen a guitar played like that since Roy Buchanan. Made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

And that's pretty much the story. Mrs. Dog was speechless. And I walked out of there in a daze.

FAN: Battle of the Roman Tub Faucet

I am cheap when it comes to some things. I will pay a service $30 to mow my lawn every week in the summer, but I usually won't pay for DIY projects around the house. I hear the basic formula for computing labor is 2x the material costs. I am remodeling our master bath and I have the materials at $3,000. I'm not paying somebody $6,000 or even $3,000 to do it for me. So I chunked it up into day jobs and I'll work on it every weekend until it's completed. The big changes are a new slate floor, the super flushing toilet I talked about earlier, a new vanity and top and I'm removing the plexi-glass door to the shower and building a wall 18" further out to make an open shower with no door or curtain. I'm also replacing all the shitty builder grade faucets. What I've learned over time and from Still A Dad is that nothing is too hard to do yourself if you break it down into steps. On the whole it sounds hard and people keep asking me "How do you know how to do that?" Well, in reality, what's the hardest thing I'm doing? I'll answer that. I did it yesterday.

We have a big soaker tub on the opposite side of a half-wall from the toilet. It's boxed in and tiled. The tub spout comes out of the half-wall horizontally with the big single knob controller. We're getting a black granite vanity top and with the slate floor, Mrs. Fan fell in love with the oil rubbed bronze fixtures. Fine. She also fell in love with these faucets that look like old country pumps sometimes called a trough faucet. I didn't think I'd like the water pressure from those for the sinks but I told her we can certainly do it for the tub.

The search went on for a single column single hole version with the controls at the top. No dice in that finish. I did find one or two that were over $500 which is too much to spend on a tub faucet when nobody even uses the tub. What I did find was a 5 hole set that had the pump faucet, 2 controls for water, a diverter and a hand held shower head. Fine. Bought it. A large framed area on the other side of the half-wall would give me access to the area to work on. I'm going to now go into Reader's Digest mode and enumerate my day.

1. The actual hole under the panel is too small to work in so I cut it out to almost the size of the panel. Ha! Prepare to be boarded. I am a DIY machine.

2. Turn off water main. Open all faucets in house. Use the super duper small pipe cutting tool that Still A Dad advised me to buy to cut the hot and cold supplies.

3. Hmmmm. I can't twist the old spout off. I've seen this before. They get funky and stay together. Better yet, maybe it was soldered on. Back to the other side to cut that pipe as well. Ha! Spout off.

4. Knob off. Plate off. Pipe octopus will not fit through gaping 5" circle in the drywall. Back to other side. Two more cuts and its out. From twisting that little tiny sucker around there so many times I realize that I have wussy computer geek hands. I know, shut up.

5. Looking at the gaping holes where the old faucert was I realize I'll need to fix that before I put the new faucet on unless I plan on replacing that entire piece of drywall (ummm, no). Luckily I have a big bucket of spackle and leftover drywall in my workshop from other projects. Draw a circle slightly smaller than hole and cut it out. Make another smaller circle as well. Use thinset to put an old piece of paneling behind the holes, push in my pieces and then spackle them in. Sigh.

6. Polish my cut pipe ends inside and out and flux them up. Push on connectors. Light torch. Catch two different 2x4's on fire, quickly blow them out (the fittings are less than an inch from the vertical studs. This entire project takes place between two studs I'm in an area about 14" wide wood to wood. Solder. Sloppily. If you put the torch down, be careful how close your head gets to it. HA! Tape and screw on stop valves.

7. Turn on pressure to house. Go around closing faucets. Peek in hole. Rats. A dribble. Sigh. Open all faucets. Turn off house main. Unscrew stop valves.

8. Heat joints. Move solder around. Add some more. Screw in stop valves. Close faucets.

9. Turn on water main. Run upstairs again. OMG. What's that? Water spraying? No No No! Oh. Whew. I forgot to close the shower faucet. Hmmm, joints look good.

10. Eat 3 slices of pizza, drink 2 Diet Cokes, call Still A Dad. I think it's 1 pm at this point. I started at 10:15. Not bad. The day is going well. Which can only mean one thing.......

11. Between the tub end and the half-wall there is about 5 inches. It's tiled with 2 pieces of different cut sizes across that ledge. I'm doing the new tile for the tub box over the existing tile as I read I can do this and I need to because I started to shred the facing wall when I started to remove tiles. The thinset really bonded to the drywall and the builders didnt use luan or anything inbetween. I'm not rebuilding that box which would mean taking out the tub. Also, the existing tile is under the tub lip so I need to leave it there for what I'm doing. I remove the strip of tile closest to the half-wall. F me. Not enough room for faucet base and the other tile goes under the tub lip as mentioned. Chisel. Hammer. Bang. Room for faucet.

12. With a paddle bit I drill my hole. I now realize I need to put two pieces of tile I removed in the back row to have a flat surface for faucet mount. Done but when I tighten the faucet, it draws the tile up on the ends. Loosen faucet. What happens next is a DIY'er nightmare.

13. To put the levers on, you first have to remove the handles to take the assembly off the unit. They have a cap on the end that needs to be removed. The gap to start the thing was about 1mm wide. I couldn't get it off. I tried everything. No screwdrive would fit, even an eyeglass one. I finally scratched the shit out of it removing it with a pair of needle nose pliers.

14. Next was worse. The tiny tiny tiny screw inside needed to be removed with an Allen wrench which they don't supply, the effers. Ha! I have an entire drawer in my workshop doodads box filled to the top with Allen wrenches that I keep from everything I build with an Allen wrench. None of them fit. Too big. I take it to the workshop but nothing works. I can't even get it by sticking in needlenose pliers and spreading them while I turn. Shazbot! Do I need to go to HD again? Finally, a screwdrive I have with reversible ends has a tiny star like thing on one end that fits it. Steps 13 and 14 took a lot of time.

15. Measure holes. Drill hole. SGDMF! I forgot about the studs and hit just enough of the one stud that the assembly wouldnt go in the hole. Move over 3/4 inch and drill again. Now the rubber gasket wont hold tight unless I fill in the other hole since they intersect. Will fix that later. Starting to wonder where holes 4 and 5 will go. Shit. Put tiles under handle and now there isnt enough room to screw it in. Was made for something not very deep and I'm going through a tile, drywall and a 2x4. Removing tile it allows me to get bite and screw it on. Now I have faucet ON tile and handle below tile. This shouldnt matter as the tub top is being tiles in a "pebble" tile which is a plastic net with real polished pebbles glued on it. Anyway, a bitch to screw this on as in most fittings you would have room for a wrench before the connector coming out the side of the bottom came into play. Since I have the nut the entire way down the body, any attempt to use a wrench interferes with the side connector turning the entire assembly. How much are plumbers?

16. Drill right handle hole. Battery dead in drill. Swap batteries. Drill. Assemble.

17. I was correct. There is now no place for diverter handle or shower head. I can;t move them forward as another 2x4 is right under tub lip. Sigh. Get beer. Wife and kid get home at 5 to go to swim banquet at 6. I tell them, not ask, that I'm not going. Mad. Mad as hornet. Still, what else was I doing today and it's a learning experience.

18. Measure over from stud and cut a new hole in the wall to place the other handle and shower head on the other side of the stud. Ha! You can't fool me. Drill both holes. Ooops. Diverter should be closer to faucet but I made the hole 1/2" from stud and diverter assembly has 4 side connectors on it in a plus. No room for soft pipes if I do that. Sigh. Since holes are already drilled (and the other battery died as paddle bit isnt that sharp anymore so grandpap's plug in made an appearance) I'll put the shower head next. In.

19. Diverter handle in. Ha! Suck it faucet! Now let's just connect everything. NOOOOOO! The soft pipe that comes in the box with the faucet won't reach to the diverter on the other side of the stud! Maybe if I drill through the stud instead of going around? Nope. Back to HD.

20. Drive down to HD and buy 30" connectors. You don't scare me faucet. I also stopped and got a "Give me that fish" and a Shamrock Shake. Mmmmmmmm. Shamrock shake.

21. There was much belching.

22. Back to finish...and you guessed it, I wasn't paying attention after my long day and bought the wrong freaking size. I knew my supply valves were 1/2" as I just bought them Friday night but I grabbed 1/2" and 3/8" not by mistake, but I thought that's what I wanted for some weird reason.

23. Shower. Cursing. Belching. "Daddy's just frustrated honey, he's OK"

24. Home Depot opens at 10 on Sundays???? Why not 6? F ME IN THE A!

25. Tortured sleep.

26. Leg cramps. Walking. Ouch!

27. Pee, Belch

28. Push cat away, hot.

29. See 28.

30. See 28.

31. 5:20 Wide awake. I hate weekends.

FAN: Old Lady In Shoe

Still A Fan on 5/3/1970

Still A Stroke on 5/29/2006

Lollipop passing out Vixen (see next post).

FAN: Still A Fan The Early Years II

This installment starts with a flavor of Pittsburgh in it. If it's not instantly recognizable to you, this photo was taken at Story Book Forest May 3rd 1970. Story Book Forest opened in 1956 as part of Idlewild Park which is the oldest amusement park in Pennsylvania opening in 1878. We recently took Still A Stroke there with grandpap and she had a blast. We took photos of her which sync up to ones we have from this trip in 1970. We always meant to buy a special frame to show these photos 40 years apart but still haven't. Do you recognize the guy in the photo? That's not Still A Dad, it's Pittsburgh's own Paul Shannon who was there that day signing autographs for kids. He hosted Saturday morning programming from what I remember but he was a local radio legend before that. I see the Good Ship Lollipop in the background. On our most recent visit there, there was a little hottie handing out lollipops. I don't remember that from 1970.


This was taken on November 8th, 1970 so I'm guessing it was either a birthday party for me or a combined one for both Still A Sis and I as our birthdays are relatively close in November. What's weird is thats Gumby in my hands. For the life of me I don't remember knowing Gumby until Eddie Murphy started doing him on SNL. I can't ever recall watching a TV show or anything related to Gumby and I have a scary memory for pop culture and can recall plotlines from cartoons of that era with uncanny accuracy. I'm going to go ahead and guess that a relative bought it for me thinking I knew who it was since I just read the character first appeared in 1953. My mom indicates that Still A Colt is standing behind me there in the nice burnt orange pants. I can barely make fun of that as you check out my wardrobe. And bonus.....check out that 1970's carpet!
This is from the same party. Mom indicates that Uncle "Chew" is behind me there who was detailed here when he died a few years ago. Gumby is now riding a tractor and I bet Uncle Chew purchased that for me as he was crazy for all things John Deere. You'll notice the obligatory Tonka dump truck by my side as well. You couldn't break one of those things if you tried. No plastic parts there kiddies. I see the wiener dog pull toy that's in Toy Story but I can't make out what the girl is playing with in the background. I think it's Still A Sis but it could also be my neighbor crush or cousin Patty, both who would have been a year or so older than me. I don;t like to use real names here so if anybody has an opinion - leave it in the comments. I think it's my sister as the hair color might give it away. Stilladog may have been at this party, but I'm guessing he was out with his friends since he was around 16 at this time I'm guessing.
And finally, Christmas 1970. Mom dutifully noted on the back of the picture that I was 2 years, 1 and 1/2 months. She couldn't just say 2 years old or assume I could figure it out using this thing called "Math". I chose this picture for obvious reasons and it's a theme throughout my life - the drums. This may be the first drum I ever owned. A good 5% of the pictures in my album contain a drum of some sort. I'm also playing it upside down! Good thing there were no snares on there. If you look over my shoulder I just had a horrible flashback about that goddamn barn toy. That white fence would NOT stand up on carpet. I remember today the frustrations caused by it. I don't remember it as a 2 year old (I don't think) but I kept that toy for a while and I clearly remember trying to set up barnyard scenes and that frigging fence falling over. If you breathed on it, walked past it or even LOOKED at it....boom. Hope you enjoyed.

FAN: Local Yocal Butchers Accused Roethlisberger

Did anyone listen to that press conference? If "Roethlisberger" was said outloud 21 times, it was mispronounced 19 of them. The guy at the mic kept calling him "Rothlismenburg". The woman butchered it a few times as well. Don't yout hink before this clown goes in front of all those cameras for the nation to see he would have learned how to say his name correctly? It's not 2004. I thought everyone knew how to say it?

FAN: Roethlisberger Accused of Sexual Assault Again

Since no charges have been filed yet, I'm going to hold off on having an opinion. However, it does give me great honor....to repost yet again, my Local 769 Pittsburgh Pipe Layers dedication poster for laying pipe "24-7".

I hope it's not true. Can you even imagine what the Rooney family is going through right now? I don't want a "Hollywood" quarterback. Can't he just stay home and play PS3 or XboX or something? Take up knitting? Crochet? Anything? I wish his ass was at the gym losing 20 pounds.

FAN: Boldin Bolsters Shitbirds

Great. Anquan Bolding was traded to the Ravens where he will get a new $28 million dollar contract. Now our crappy corners will have to cover him twice a year for four years. The Browns and Bengals...don't you feel sorry for them? The Ravens offense may really take off this year. It's a good trade and sign for them. I'm actually impressed. I'm wondering what we'll end up doing. If Ryan Clark signs elsewhere, Troy's hammies will blow out by week 4 again this year trying to cover everyone else's ass.

FAN: SuperFreakonomics

I don't get out to bookstores half as much as I'd like to anymore and that's how I used to keep in touch with what I like to read. While Christmas shopping I went into one and saw that there was a sequel to Freakonomics, one of my favorite books. To a guy who loves numbers and statistics, the words on these pages morph into crack for my brain.

I didn't buy it then but I did order it recently off of Overstock.com in hardback for a ridiculous price. I also threw in Gladwell's "What The Dog Saw" which is a collection of his writings for The New Yorker. I could read Gladwell all day. His series of books are all in my top 10 - The Tipping Point, Blink and Outliers. All genius. Books for a numbers geek!

So I don't want to ruin the book for would be readers so if you plan to read and want to be surprised don't read much more. The subject matter is equally priceless this time - fascinating even.

The economy of prostitution opens the book. It details how and why you have your $10,000 Ashleigh Dupree types and your $5 crack whore types. It details pricing as per location just a few city blocks apart and why the prices relative to everything else have fallen so much since the 30's and 40's....and why oral used to be double the cost of conventional.

Another section is about the guy who profiled terrorists based on their money trail. They had no idea how stupid they were being after people started paying attention post 9/11. There is one mistake the guy wouldn't tell, but other ones were very interesting. For instance, they have no life insurance! Why would they? Most of them are planning to die. Pretty funny. They also don't make any transactions during their praying times or temple times. Holy terrorist nuts don't miss a service or a prayer.

Maybe the best part of the book is debunking global warming or at minimum cheap ways to fix the latest trend. It was amazing to me to read about the articles Newsweek and the like were printing in the 70's about global cooling. Hilarious. It was determined that a huge volcano eruption caused that cooling by creating a makeshift shield in the atmosphere of particles. It lasted several years. A lot of the particles were carbon related. Some top global warning scientists have now changed their minds and accepted these new findings....that everyone trying to use less carbon is actually making the temperature rise because there is less of a shield in the atmosphere without all the particles.

Every cheap answer seems to be instead of not releasing carbon, releasing something like 1.5% more carbon into the high atmosphere than what is there right now. That would be enough to reverse the last decade or two of temps rising. I'm not a scientist, well technically I am, but if the biggest table pounders for global warming are signing off on this theory - it's hard to deny. Of course Al Gore won't even recognize the science, but he laughed at the people who wouldn't recognize his science. Fat loser.

Finally, another short part that made me laugh was about teahcing economics to monkeys with special coins. They tied the last chapter to the first by having documented accounts of a male monkey giving a coin to a female monkey, humping her unmercifully for 8 seconds, and then the female monkey took her coin and bought food with it. Priceless! I'm off to read "What The Dog Saw".

Stilladog, what did you see?