FAN: Cleveland Chooses Holmgren's Mediocrity

Thank You Cleveland Browns. Thank You, Thank You....Thank You. Why? For hiring The Walrus of course! This hyped up pile of steaming poo is the poster boy for NFL mediocrity. I can't believe (actually I can) the way the press is all over every move the man makes. Where are the graphics showing the man's credentials to take over a franchise? Without knowing the facts before writing this I think his credentials suck monkey balls.

So, off to Wikipedia I go, in search of why Cleveland is all gaga over this guy. Holmgren coached 7 years in Green Bay with a record of 75-37. Very good. He began with 3 9-7 seasons in a row while Brett Favre learned how to play the game and then while Brett was in his prime he road his horse for a 48-16 record and playoff success and a Super Bowl win (and a SB loss). He had great success at Green Bay when tethered to Favre and his waistline, I mean legend, grew.

This is where it gets fun. Mike's ego wanted to run his own team. He wanted to buy the ingredients and cook the meal. Seattle offered him that opportunity and he jumped at the chance in 1999. He went 9-7 in his first year there. Decent enough but it takes time to turn a program around, right? He got worse in 2000. Much worse. His record was 6-10. Ask Bill Belimort, it's hard as Hell to win games without a star quarterback. In his third season as Seattle's football czar, Mike went 9-7 again. Ok, Now he's back on track and is set up to succeed in season four - except he didn't. He went 7-9. So, the genius Mike Holmgren was brought in to win and so far as the man in charge of everything, he's posted a 31-33 record. How did ownership react? They stripped him of his GM role and said "Just coach please". He couldn't run the organization. He failed at the thing he wanted most.

Without running the organization he had immediate success going 10-6 but lost the first playoff game. Like most of his tenure, he failed to put together back-to-back good seasons and went 9-7 followed by another first round playoff loss. Maybe Mike should change his name officially to "Nine Wins Holmgren". He finally delivered in 2005 going 13-3 but lost the Super Bowl (he he he) to a far superior team and then blamed the referees instead of being a man. Nice character there, Niner. You can only guess that he went 9-7 in 2006. He showed a little promise going 10-6 in 2007 but he lost in the playoffs to.......Brett Favre. Sigh. That must have really rocked his world because he ended his Seattle stint with a 4-12 record. Let me repeat that....a 4-12 record. In totality, in Seattle, the genius was 86-74 and 4-6 in the playoffs.

Cleveland wants a football czar. Hmmmm, who should they seek out? How about a coach who has 7 seasons with 10 wins or more out of 17 seasons. Out of the other 10 campaigns, 7 of them were 9 win seasons. Yawn. And don't forget he got shit canned as the GM after only 4 years. He hasn't had back-to-back 10 win seasons since 1998 and that was with Favre. The fact that this man is so sought after is mind boggling to me. I read once where he wanted to go open a coffee shop or a B&B and retire. He should have followed his dream.

What has Cleveland gained since employing Mike? Well, they decided to keep a coach with a career NFL record of 28-36 because he had a 4 game winning streak. I'm impressed. The fact that Mangini went 10-6 in his first year with the Jets and 4-12 in his second tells me he went 10-6 with somebody else's team. Whatever. So what do I read this morning? Holmgren is close to hiring Seattle's Pro Personnel director to be Cleveland's GM. He's worked with him before in Green Bay and Seattle. Super! Steeler fans rejoice! Mike is going to bring his amazing streak of mediocrity to the Browns by surrounding himself with cronies from the old days who have already failed with him at other locations.

People, People, People.....please pull back the curtain and take a good look at your wizard. Your wizard isn't a wizard at all. Your wizard, is a walrus.