FAN: Worst and Best of Saturday

Let me begin this rant by saying that you'll be hard-pressed to find another male my age that gets more "up" for Christmas. I listen to Christmas Tunes from Thanksgiving through New Year's, I actually look forward to putting lights up outside my house, I handle the Christmas cards for my family, I watch all the "old school" Christmas Specials with my daughter so she'll appreciate the classics and I really honestly try to buy people gifts that I think they'll like....not just what's on sale. As I'm typing this, I'm listening to Trans-Siberian Orchestra and we just got done watching "Elf" for the 37th time. I like Christmas. Ya Feel Me? Well, yesterday.....not so much. A group of our friends from our church and daughter's school had planned to go to New York City. One of the ladies organizes trips and she had a bus for a 40+ person party and tickets for the Christmas Spectacular at Radio City Music Hall. We weren't going to the show as we had other things we wanted to get in. We were to meet at the school at 7:30 AM for a 7:45 departure. When we got there, it took a couple of minutes to figure out, but the bus wasn't there and the hostess was away from us on the phone. Uh-Oh. Not a good sign. She came over to us teary-eyed and we felt really bad for her as she's one of the nicest people on the planet. It seems the bus company that she's used the last 3 years for this trip mistakenly put down the date from last year's trip as the date for this year's trip which would be Monday, not Saturday, and she even called to confirm a few days ago. They had a bus, but they didn't have a driver. I offered to drive, but nobody seemed real excited at that prospect. As the start time of the show loomed large, the group decided to trek up to Trenton NJ where we could catch a direct train in. The drive is about 45 minutes to Trenton. So, with everyone not knowing exactly where to go, Mr. Hostess booked back to his house and printed out copies of directions for everyone. Luckily, we had GPS with us so we left. Some folks didn't have enough gas to get there so there were splinter groups everywhere headed up to Trenton. When we got there, of course the lot was full so we had to go to another pay lot. It was at this point that my daughter figured out she couldn't take her bag with her that she was going to leave on our chartered bus. It had a blanket, some sketch pads....stuff like that. Oh Well. We got inside and Mr. Hostess was already in line buying 40-something roundtrip tickets to NYC as they felt horrible about the bus. They also had tons of snacks, wine and beer for the bus that we couldn't take on the train.
We made the next train which took just over an hour to get to the city and gave the folks going to the show about 25 minutes to get to Radio City Music Hall. This actually worked out for us because now we could stay later than the departure time of the bus which was 5 PM. Instead of having 7 hours in the city.....we now had all day. We didn't need to be back until the last train. Now the fun just really starts. I had my Crackberry set to Google Maps and we had a portable GPS, but I had our day mapped out in my head and it was to start at 42nd street bus station....not Penn Station at 31st and 7th. Our first stop was Times Square so we had 10 blocks to walk and that doesn't count the two I started in the wrong direction making it essentially 14. Nice. As we neared where Broadway and 7th intersect, the crowds became unbearable. You literally couldn't stop walking. If you did, you'd get run over. They had 2 cops at every road in each intersection making 8 cops per. If it wasn't for the cops, the cars wouldn't be able to move. It was crazy. I put my daughter between us and I lead the way. I worked in Center City Philadelphia for 5 years, but the busiest parts of Philly at lunch were nothing like this. Nothing. It was a crush of humanity. It was taking significant time to just go one block. We ducked into Toys R Us. What a mess. There was no place to stand. We got in line for the Ferris Wheel, but it was sold out for the next hour. It looked like the inside of an ant farm in the store. I'm not sure how you could even shop. We saw the Barbie life size dollhouse and left. We ducked into a slightly less busy Swatch store and enjoyed the space for a while.....even bought a really cool watch for princess. I got my bearings as we were headed up to Top of The Rock next. We went back out into the mess and started walking again. I can't emphasize enough how crowded it was. If you hesitated for 1/10 second 5 people got between you and your party. It was a madhouse. 30 Rock was cool and we bought our tickets the night before online, but literally, it's a $60 elevator ride for 3. It was a pretty clear 38-40 degree day so the views were good...but 70 floors up, it's crisp. We came down and checked our time as we had reservations with friends at American Girl Place. We went out to the plaza to check the Ice Rink wait.....over an hour. We snapped pics of the tree and the skaters and then tried to leave the crowd behind. I swear to the dude born on Christmas that you didn't have 1 foot of free space in any direction from you. We had 30 minutes to spare so we went to St. Patrick's Cathedral which was right there. Again, I felt like cattle going to slaughter. We waited in a line to light a candle and walk past the nativity scene...which was nothing special other than being semi life-sized. I checked my map and headed to the land of dolls. We passed another huge line and discovered it was for Saks window displays. I was glad it wasn't for American Girl Place......until I saw the line for American Girl Place. Jesus, Joseph and Mary. I swear to Buddha there were over 150 people in front of us. Everyone said it moved fast. As people came out they let people in. The entrance is on the long block sides and it was over half a block long. When we got in, it was worse than Toys R Us. Not even sure how you could see anything. We immediately went up to the 4th floor and checked in for dining. When I saw the guy of the family we were eating with.....he looked beat up. He has 3 girls. I don't know how he could keep tabs on all 3 in the store, let alone on the street. I turned me head once and I lost my 2 much shorter family members. It's insane. The had security at the top of every escalator. I don't know how they make any money in their stores with the amount of workers they have. I told my wife there must have been 150 employees working. I'm not kidding. Don;t even get me started on the cost of the food or what it consisted of. It was at this point that we decided we had had enough. It was about 4:00 PM. We had been in NYC for 5 hours and it seemed like 50. My daughter wanted to get her doll's hair done. We went to the spa and checked the wait.....1 hour 20 minutes. We should have checked her in before eating but we didn't know you could do that. Disappointed again, we left the store. We contemplated taking a cab as we were now on 49th and 5th...needing to go to 31st and 7th. Ugh. We decided to walk back. That lasted about the length of one long block where I was touched by about 64 strangers and I hailed a cab. It was princess' first cab ride and it was everything you hear about. Fast. Furious. Reckless. Couldn't understand a damn word the guy said. Not even sure where he was from. To go the 18 short blocks took about 3 minutes and the fare was only $4.90. Here's $10, Merry Freaking Christmas. Whatever he said back he was very Happy. Now we just had to walk the 2 long blocks as their was gridlock traffic and I didn't want to change a $5 fare into $20 with the wait. We at least had space to maneuver down there as the crowds were all in Times Square.....until we go to the NJ Transit portion of the trains. When they announced Trenton, the entire world stood up to go to track 13. Another crush of humanity. I again put my daughter between us and you didn't have to think about moving. The crowd was moving us. I could see fear in my daughter's face and I didn't like it. Mind you, these are families just like us trying to get into the correct tunnel. The next train was in 14 minutes. You weren't going to turn into a pumpkin or a pillar of salt if you didn't make this train. We finally got through the doorway and there was the double-decker train awaiting us. Most doors were already closed. We found one with a few empty seats but they weren't together. I had 2 young guys move their stuff off of two unoccupied seats for my wife and daughter. They were 4 seats facing each other in a corner. I had a guy right behind them move his stuff so I could sit with him and he wasn't happy about it. After thinking about it, and seeing how uncomfortable my daughter was.....I again stood up and asked the two guys to trade seats with me and this dude so I could sit with my family. They seemed reluctant at first, I have no idea why, and then I was like "come on guys, I want to sit with my daughter" so they agreed. So, what was the good part of Saturday? We were home at 7:30, in the snow, sitting in the hot tub at a nice 102 degrees. My daughter said something very poignant at that point....."Can you believe just 3 hours ago the mess we were in?". Very astute. No, baby, I can't. Mark this down....I will never, ever.......ever........go back to New York after Thanksgiving. I want to go back for sure, but not to the tourist trap that is Times Square. F That. I was just at Disney in April and I never once feared getting separated from my child. I clutched her hand yesterday like Rosie O'Donnell clutching a Klondike bar. I was very uncomfortable and like I said, I'm fairly used to navigating urban areas on foot. I have no idea how older couples from Iowa do it. I really don't. New York for Christmas? Bah Effing Humbug.

DOG: We Must Beat The Cowgirls!

Looking at our remaining games, I'd say this Sunday's matchup against the Dallas Cowgirls is no more than the 3rd most important of our remaining 4 games. Baltimore, breathing down our neck is a division rival and is by far the most important of the 4. Tennessee leading the Conference would be second. And Dallas third simply by virtue of the fact that the Cleveland Browns are, well, the Cleveland Browns. Except for one very important thing...

My grandson, we'll call him "Little Dog" (pictured), lives in the Greater Dallas-Ft. Worth metroplex. Little Dog will be celebrating his second Christmas. And already his dad is telling me, "It's going to be hard to keep him from being a Cowboys fan. There's a lot of them down here." Well, that's like saying there's a lot of retards in Special Ed. In fact that's pretty much exactly what he's saying!

Anyway, last year for Little Dog's first Christmas, me & Mrs. Dog got him his very own Ben Roethlisberger jersey. And I am going to make damn sure his mama puts it on him Sunday. He got a couple Stiller bibs too which Fan and I picked up at a shop in Market Square during our visit to the 'burgh for the 75th Anniversary Team beatdown of the Shitbirds last November.

On top of that, I'm spending Christmas with Little Dog and I want to be able to wear my Big Daddy Lipscomb "76" throwback jersey in the DFW Airport when I arrive!

In addition I have a good friend who is pregnant with twins who is a natural born Cowgirl having lived her whole life in Ft. Worth. She got Stiller bibs as baby shower gifts for her girls too courtesy of Stilladog. She's due any day now. I told her if the Stillers win on Sunday and she delivers on Sunday she must name her twin girls, Benita and Hinesella.

This folks, is the strength of Steeler Nation. This is why we can take 10,000 seats in any stadium in America. We pass the privilege of being Stiller fans down from generation to generation. That is why young men and women who have never set foot in Allegheny County, let alone the city of Pittsburgh will be roaring and yelling Here We Go! at the top of their lungs, Terrible Towels waving at every NFL Stadium from Seattle to Miami, New England to San Diego. They are descendants of Pittsburghers and Western Pennsylvanians. Oh, we do travel well. But most of us are already there.

So we got to beat the Cowgirls this weekend to really plant the seed. For my family's sake. We got to do it. Teach the children. Convert the non-believers.

Snow and 28 degrees predicted for Heinz at game time. Tony Homo has played like 4 games in below 40 his whole life. Silverback not like Homo. Silverback kill Homo. And if you think T.O. is coming over the middle, you're nuts. He saw what happened to Welker.

I like our chances. Last three weeks, snow, snow and torrential downpour = 3 wins. More snow is good. HERE WE GO!!

FAN: The Ultimate Mashup

Wow, this is cool. With Led Zeppelin being in my Top 3 bands of all time (not sure where though) and Bloom County being my favorite print comic....this is kind of like pop culture crack for me. The way the Zeppelin riffs are weaved together with Christmas songs is pure genius. Me likey. I want to get this in mp3 format.

DOG: If Wes Welker Was a Steeler We'd Love Him

Heres why

He ain't as tough as Hines Ward, but he's close.

DOG: Dump Truck Dumped... What? Agin???

Yesiree folks. Najeh "The Dump Truck" Davenport has been released by the Pittsburgh Steelers... for the third time in the past year. Future signings and releases of Mr. Truck will not be covered by Stilladog here on Steel City Slant on account of nobody gives a rats ass.

To think I put all that time and effort into finding a yellow dump truck, putting a "44" on the door, finding a Stillers logo for the bed, formulating a shade of yellow to match the truck to blend the corners of the logo. And the dude lasts 1 game on the inactive roster which yields him a game check and he's cut again.

On a positive note, this means that evidently Willie Parker's knee responded well to game situations and Najeh is again rendered useless.

Just hope the Cowboys don't pick him up. I hear Marion "The Barbarian" Barber is highly questionable for Sunday's game.

FAN: Steelers Destroy Patriots

It was a beautiful day for football, wasn't it? The Patriots smacked around at home. Ahh, everything will be fine in the universe for the next 6 days. Not much to say about the game other than my random musings which begin now: Willie showed a nice burst on his first carry. During the Steeler's first offensive series, shouldn't we have run more? Belichick in hoodie down - stupid, Belichick in hoodie up - stupider. Early in the game, starting a series inside their own 15, after already giving up a pick and a score, we threw three straight times on a three and out. I like Russel and Holmes returning kicks and punts. After Holmes scored on a nice move off a pump fake - Dan Dierdork mentioned it 5 times and yet they failed to show the move on replay. Fat Casey got mad and had a sack 2 plays later....his first of the year. Does that mean he's not trying hard enough the rest of the time? Troy Polamalu's spin move to get an extra 15 yards on his pick was something out of 1940. Sweet. When you are winning 23-10 with 9 minutes remaining and your star RB has a recently healed knee....why is he still in the game? Especially when Moore was doing fine. When was the last time Gillette stadium was empty with 10 minutes to play? When Ike Taylor flipped the ball to Jabar Gaffney after Gaffney's miss, it was the most animated Belimort was all day! That's saying something. Instead of being mad that his defense gave up 180 rushing....he was mad at that??? I laugh at your stupidity. With less than 5 minutes to go you could hear Steeler Nation chanting "Here We Go", music to my ears. Last but certainly not least - Dan Dierdorf said 12 times today that the drops didn't look like they were being caused by the rain. Did you see how hard it was raining? He's a nut bag. When it's raining that hard, it's like a thin coating of oil is on the ball when it's spinning like that. It rained the entire warmup and game....hard. Don't tell me from your dry booth you old coot that the rain had nothing to do with the drops. Nothing? Maybe it was hard to see through....hard to pick up the ball.....rain in your eyes....surprised at just how wet the ball was when it hit you..... DORK!

DOG: Stillers 33, Cheatriots 10 - Game Notes

• Well, well. Seems when Billy B. doesn't have accurate surveilance he becomes far less of a genius. In fact, he looked more like the Notre Dame coach and the Cleveland Browns coach than Vince Lombardi.


• Matt Cassell however does look just like Tom Brady... gay.


• I would take the 15 yard penalty, and the inevitable fine coming from Roger GODdell every time, to knock out a little weasel like Wes Welker. My only question is, why did it take us 'til the second half to knock the piss out of him? Thank you, Ryan Clark!


• That Randy Moss is money. He looked like Jackie Smith in Super Bowl XIII. Dropping the sure TD in the end zone.


• The Silverback is by far the defensive player of the year in the NFL.


• I said back a few weeks ago I'd wait to see what the Stillers brought into Gillette Stadium before I made up my mind. My mind is now made up. We are riding! At least me and my dog (Dog's dog) Mattie are riding. Into the playoffs. Anybody want to join us?


• This is the first time since... well since he called for a QB bootleg on 3rd and 6 in the playoffs last year, that I watched an entire Steeler game without bitching incessantly about Bruce Arians.


• I like Mike Tomlin better with each passing week, win or lose.


• And for all you Tom Brady loving Patriots apologists among our 35 readers: I hope you wore your Patriots jerseys today with pride. You are every bit as pathetic as the Patriot "fans" who abandoned the stadium in the 3rd quarter and left the New England night air ringing with a resounding "Here We Go STEELERS! HERE WE GO!!" as CBS cut over to the Jets-Broncos game.


• Saddle up Stillers, we got some Cowboys to take care of next.

FAN: Johnstown Inclined Plane

From a little site seeing jaunt over Thanksgiving. The pics at original size and detail are pretty cool at 12 mp. Just didn't want to have overkill on here. The overlook is not a good place to be if heights bother you at all. Funny thing, I never knew these were here and it's supposedly the world's steepest incline at 71%. Learn something new every day.

FAN: Plax's Brother?

This is rich. Why is it that the screwups continue to be screwups? From the day he bounced up from catching a pass untouched and spiked it - we all questioned his mental capacity. Everytime he does something stupid, he says "hey, I'm human, I make mistakes". No. You're mentally challenged, you make lots of mistakes. I was going to call him retarded, but I didn't want to insult any retarded people. Why don't they just cut him? Cut him right now. Jerry Jones can't wait for him to get cut. The thing that makes myself and millions of football fans crazy, is that if this shithead had half of Hines Ward's heart, he'd be dominating the league year after year. Instead, I hear Randy Moss in my head whenever I see Plax...."I play when I want to play". I still blame him for not squeezing a pass in the back of the endzone that would have sent us to the Super Bowl one year instead of the stinking Patriots. Speaking of the Patriots -we need to split these next four games. I don't care how they win two or who they do it against, but we need two at minimum.

DOG: The Dump Truck Rides Again!

While I was giving thanks for all my blessings, then gorging myself on turkey, pork loin, steamed oysters, mashed potaotoes, sauerkraut, and more cassaroles than you can shake a stick at, the Steelers re-signed Najeh "Dump Truck" Davenport.

This marks the Dump Truck's third tour of duty with the Stillers in the last year. Presumably he is an insurance policy against further running back injuries. I sure do prefer to see my "33" returning kickoffs than the plodding Dump Truck. It's a toss-up in short yardage situations, but either one is a better option than Willie Parker or Mewelde Moore in moving the pile.

Safe holiday travels to everyone. Kill the Patriots!!

FAN: Feels Like Winter

We arrived at our Thanksgiving destination to find over 6 inches of snow. Dudes, I'm going sled riding!
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

FAN: Ernster Gone, Parker Down

Well, the Steelers cut Paul Ernster (thank God), but they brought back Mitch Berger (my God). Also, in what is becoming too routine, Parker may not play this week. I can't wait for next year to see what Mendenhall can really do. I may pickup the slack from Pittgirl's absence doing the What Were They Really Thinking? bit every once in a while. No time this week, maybe next.

FAN: Gonna Get Me Some Trim

Ummm, if you are hiring a Clown to show up at a kid's party, you might not want to pick one with 'Trim" in his name. I remember when I was on drumline - we used to play a cadence that had a break in it where we all screamed something. We would make a list of 4-5 things that we would use on the way up and down the hill we practiced on. We would also do it for parades. One of the drumline's standard words was "MIRT", which was "trim" backwards. We didn't think we could get away with screaming 'Trim". I think this clown needs to be prison raped a few times.....and he will be......total justice.

DOG: Polamalu - The New "Mean Joe?"

Word around the campfire is that Coca-Cola is shooting a new commercial to be aired during the Super Bowl. It's a remake of the famous Mean Joe Greene commercial starring Troy Polamalu in the role of Mean Joe.

Troy is by no means as mean or as scary as Mean Joe. But they do share an unparalleled intensity on the field and a soft-spoken personality off it.

Sure would be cool to see Steelers during the game and during the commercials too!

Axl Rose or Meatloaf?

When did Axl Rose become Meatloaf?

FAN: DMV Blues

I woke up today in a great mood. 5:15 AM. Went to bed early. Spent some time organizing my half tb drive, had some Diet Cokes, ate some breakfast...looked up the exact address of the DMV Photo Station.....WHAT? Yup. It's that time again. I'm already overdue. Heck, my birthday was a few weeks ago. I filed for the temporary (I'm late) camera card and waited for it in the mail. The last time I needed my photo taken I had to wait an ungodly amount of time so this time I decided to be proactive - I'll be there when they open. I showed up at 8:20 and they open at 8:30. Perfect. There were already four people in line so I was fifth. After turning around I could see the number of people still sitting in their cars waiting until the place opened. They were too fragile to be out in the cold so now they'll pay the price with a longer wait inside (insert evil laugh here). The doors opened promptly at 8:30 and we were herded into a straight line where there was a machine spitting out ticketed numbers. There were at least 30 people in line by now. You had to press A for photo license, B for permits and C for driving exams. Simple enough. "A" it is. I walked into the room and it was very confusing, this from a tech savvy process engineer. I already see the lady that was first in line up at one of the "kiosks". A quick scan told me there were six kiosks. Each had a digital sign above it marked "01", "02"....."06". Again, simple enough. I looked down at my ticket. I had "A003". Good deal. I look back up at the numbers above the workers and the guy sitting at "03" looks pretty surly. He was about 38-43, probably as tall as me, bigger than me....but soft. He was balding but what was there was dyed platinum blond. I thought that was weird as well as we were out in the middle of nowhere and it was a bit hickish....but whatever. Since nobody was with him and he was at "03" and my ticket said "A003", I thought I was supposed to go there. I walked up to him, displayed my ticket and said as politely as possible "Is this where I'm supposed to be?" he pointed towards 5 and 6 and said "Over there" like he was a principal and I was in 3rd grade. Hmmm. Well, not everyone in the service industry is friendly. I smiled and asked "Which line?" Answering me like he'd been there 8 hours already instead of 2 minutes he said "A's A's, with the A's". Ladies and gentlemen, I can assure you there are no signs saying which desks are for what. I said "Oh, ok, because I have A003 and your sign says 03, that's why I thought it was your line." I was told that there is an arrow on the ticket spitter that should have directed me in the right direction. The ticket spitter was the size of a parking meter. It's also probably right between desks 3 and 4 so regardless if it said left or right, 3 or 4 was still fair game in my estimation. Calculating all of that pretty quickly in my head, I replied with a hearty "Wow, you're in a good mood this morning". I wasn't mad. I was pointing out in the only way I knew how that he was being an asshole. If he would have laughed back or even hinted that it was cool, it would have been cool. Obviously it was not cool. As I turned to go sit down, with the attention now of the room and other workers he blurted "Sir, you asked me where to go, I told you where to go, you were one of the first people here this morning, you should be able to figure it out". At this point I was going to remind the semi-slow help that I pay his salary, but I didn't. I gave him my best smirk and just said "Yup, leave it to the government to have tickets with both letters and numbers on them, six different lines, numbers above the lines that look like they're able to change and oh by the way....why are kiosks 5 and 6 'A' instead of kiosks 1 and 2?" I turned around to walk back to the folding chairs to wait my turn. And to be honest, I wasn't mad (yet). I was in complete control. As I sat there thinking about how huge an ass this guy was, I found myself staring at him. Hard. Even though in the battle of wits my howitzer trumped his old board with a nail in it (rusty nail at that), I didn't want him to think he in any way intimidated me. I couldn't believe what jolted me out of my haze of cleverness....."What are you staring at?". Oh No He Didn't. I said "Excuse me?" He reiterated his question. "Space", I replied. "Don't stare at me, you're not allowed to stare at me". Now, I admit, I did have a George Costanza moment. Had I had my "A" game on me, I would have replied "I'm trying to figure out if your hair is 'Aruba Sunshine' or 'Dandelion Yellow'. But I didn't have my "A" game. He surprised me actually by continuing the exchange. I went with "Dude, what's your problem? I'm just trying to get in the right line and get out of here." You won't believe the answer. "No, you got your answer, and then you gave me shit". I started to laugh this time. I turned around and almost asked for a show of hands at how many people heard that. "Nice language. Very articulate, especially in front of all these witnesses". I swear I heard a cricket. It seemed like 2 or 3 seconds and then the regular sounds of the office started up again. An older gentleman called my number soon after and as I walked towards him, he winked at me and said "Now it's your turn , buddy". He was nice as pie to me and then it hit me....I think he was glad I said something back to this ass clown. He has to work with him everyday, two desks down. Ugh. I called him "Sir". I was very friendly. I thanked him, shook his hand and turned to leave. There was a little devil sitting on my left shoulder. He was like "flick him off.....see if he'll blow his stack....get him fired". I was like, "shut up little devil dude, you're getting me in trouble". He whispered "He started it, yo. Go tell him he's lucky you didn't break your foot off in his ass". "Nah little devil dude, my wife won't like it if she has to bail me out of jail over something this stupid." Tell him we should be able to do this online and he shouldn't have a job! I almost turned to him and said "Hey man, you have a good day" but I didn't. As I walked back through the now crowded room, I counted no less than 3 people nod their approval at me. Still A. Wife thought maybe I should have got his name and called Harrisburg but what's the point? I think the fact that he completely lost his cool and I stayed relatively calm was a win.

DOG: Winged Wildcat

You have no doubt noticed a formation being used by a great many NFL teams lately called the "Wildcat" formation. It's resurgence started when Miami defeated New England earlier this year by using this formation and a direct snap to Ronnie Brown who had a field day with it.

When I saw it I said, "Man, that ain't nothin' new. Looks like the old Single Wing to me." So in order to validate my point I started to do some research on the Wildcat. It did indeed validate some points I was making while arguing with the football illiterate here in Crab Cake city. But I learned a whole lot more.

First thing I learned is that almost all offensive formations have evolved from some variant of the single wing. The Wishbone (Darrell Royal at Texas), the Veer (Johnny Majors at Pitt), are variations that were used to win national titles. Even the T-formation which replaced it is a variation. Knute Rockne used to line up his Notre Dame team in a T formation and shift to the single wing prior to the snap thus inventing "men in motion." In fact, things like the triple option, and the naked bootleg have their origins in the single wing.

The single wing was first invented by Glenn "Pop" Warner to give the undermanned undersized Carlisle Indians the ability to compete with the great football teams of the day in 1907. And also to take advantage of the very unique skills of his best player, Jim Thorpe. And indeed, the Carlisle Indians were among the best if not the very best football team in America as a result. Details of this fact can be explored in a book I highly recommend called The Real All-Americans which is a history lesson that goes much deeper than football.

Paul Johnson used a variation of the Single Wing at Navy which produced one bowl team after another for the last 5 or 6 years. He just rung up nearly 500 rushing yards on the Miami Hurricanes with it on Thursday night with his new team, Georgia Tech.

Jock Sutherland won two national championships at Pitt in 1936 and 1937 using it. And Sutherland installed it as his primary offense when he took over as coach of the Steelers in 1946. The old-timers will insist the Steelers would have won an NFL title with it after reaching the playoffs in 1947 had Sutherland not died suddenly in 1948. The Steelers were the last pro team to use it as their primary formation as late as 1953.

Pretty much any play that starts with a center snap that is "tossed" rather than "handed" is considered a single wing formation. So that makes the Shotgun formation, first used by the 49ers in 1960, a single wing variant. The single-wing is an unbalanced formation with more men on one side of the ball than the other. A balanced version with equal players on both sides is called the Double-Wing. It's objective is to fool the defense with ball movement and men-in-motion as well as create double team blocking at the point of attack.

Back in the early days when running the ball was paramount, the single-wing or one of it's descendants was used by practically everyone. But a fellow down at TCU, coach Dutch Meyer, started spreading the wingbacks out as flankers and slot men to create greater passing opportunities out of the formation. This is evidence that Rich Rodriguez did not invent the "Spread" offense that is so prevalent in college football today. It's been around since the 1950s.

Yeah, the Spread is the passing version of the Single Wing! The difference is that in the original Single-Wing the Quarterback was the primary blocking back whereas the Tailback or Fullback were generally the players who handled the ball. Although a direct snap to any of the three was not uncommon.

With the increasing popularity of the Wildcat offense I predict we will see a shift to this style of offense in the NFL. Why? Because high schools and colleges all across the country are using it. And a plethora of talented young players are entering the NFL with the skills to make it work .

I submit to you our own Dennis Dixon could run a Spread or Wildcat series for the Steelers. Darren McFadden (a single-wing high school QB) already runs it in Oakland and did some at Arkansas too. Almost any team has a player capable of taking a direct snap, reading a defense and either running or distributing the ball. Antwaan Randle-El would be perfect. And in college you have Pat White at West Virginia and Tim Tebow at Florida who would be great Wildcat tailbacks. Well, Tebow, I guess, would be more of a fullback.

Someday we'll come full circle. But you read it here first. The Wildcat is here to stay!

DOG: Haluski for the Dog!

This week I had the pleasure of enjoying, for the first time in many a year, a dish that somewhat defines who we are as Western Pennsylvanians. I'm talkin' 'bout Haluski, baby!

Some claim Haluski to be a Polish dish, others say it's of Slovak origin. My Grandmother used to make it and she was German. But one thing for sure. There ain't any shortage of folks with those ethnic backgrounds in the Greater Pittsburgh area. And there is of course various ways it can be prepared, so maybe it's all the above.

It's pretty much just homemade noodles and cabbage cooked with butter and onions and whatever else your ethnic slant calls for.

We had sort of a pot-luck Thanksgiving luncheon (that lasted 3 days) at my work on Tuesday. When I saw a crock pot full of that stuff I got so excited I felt the blood rush to my groin! And of course 90% of the knuckleheads I work with didn't know what it even was. But I have the good fortune of working with a lady from Latrobe who brought it in. And we had a good laugh that nobody knew what it was but us. It was the ass kickin'est thing we had among a bunch of cassaroles etc. Whipped the ass off the Kielbasa Jambalaya I brought in.

And the moral of the story is Yinzers trump Baltimorons in the kitchen as well as at the football stadium.

FAN: Tortfeasor

What the hell is a tortfeasor? It sounds like a villain in a bad movie. "Jimmy, if you don't do your homework, the Tortfeasor will get you."
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Fan: Cut Ernster

I could find a one-legged cripple with a club foot who can punt farther than this nancy girl. I'm pretty sure my nine year old daughter can too.
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Fan: What shall we call him?

Still A. Dog or Stilladog? While the end credits of each post say who wrote what, to make it more obvious, maybe we'll tag each Title with "Fan:" or "Dog:". And if you're wondering about the related comment I made....The Dog is actually Still A Dad's first cousin, but he's my brother from another mother. If you take the age difference between me and pops and divide it by two, that is where the dog resides.

Still A. Dog To Write

Bitching and moaning constantly that I have tailed off in the writing department and that there was a void in cyberspace has caused the inevitable - Still A Dog will no longer just comment and guest post......he is now an unedited writer and contributor to Steel City Slant. My God.....what have I done? I have waxed poetic lately about how I don't have that much free time anymore with my little swimmer constantly getting shuttled to meets and practices. I think I'm working more at my "real" job lately and 4th grade homework is no joke. I still maintain www.wealthblocks.com but I'm reconsidering that at the moment as well. I am currently building another site that I hope draws more attention (read "ad clicks") than my previous attempt. I'd like to get back into consulting with www.webplunk.com as well and I even have a client lined up that I keep blowing off because I don't have time to do what she wants. So yes, all of this has contributed to my lack of posting lately. I haven't done a new comic in a while and I used to really enjoy that. Still Moor has been asking me for another drum track for a while and I haven't been able to do that yet. I figure the addition of Dog will allow us both to comment on each other while sharing what's going on in our somewhat related brains. Scary....I know. I still think Still A. While should consider my offer as she's definitely one of the snarkiest and smartest peeps I know. A girl's perspective would be nice. Up in the photo we have left to right....Still A. Dad, Still A Dog, Yours Truly and the Uncle of all Uncles....Still A. Unc. In fact, while The Dog can now post "at will", if anyone with a "Still A" moniker wants to write a guest piece for me to post - let me know and I'll post it for you.

That's My Grill

Chad done stole my grill! WTF? Steeler fans, if we've ever needed to not play down to the competition, tonight is the night. With the Patriots, Cowboys, Ravens and Titans lined up - we really need this win. If we smack the Bengals and Browns around and split the other 4 games mentioned above - we'll be 11-5 and win the division. At 10-6, maybe the Ravens tie us. If they win the next game against us, I'm not sure who would win the tie breaker. Winning tonight will certainly make things a lot easier. The Bungles are still the Bungles, but Marvin has challenged them to win out. Chad is sitting because he's selfish, but they may play better as a team without him. He's a poor man's Dennis Rodman. He said when he came into the league he was the best wide receiver in his family, taking a good natured jab at first cousin Keyshawn Johnson. I seriously doubt Chad will last long enough to eclipse the numbers Keyshawn put up. Not only that, Keyshawn typically played hard. Bill Parcells loved him and that's all you need to know about his toughness. Back to tonight's game, I see Ben having time to throw and I think tonight the running game will be back in full force. I want to see "33" smacking some bodies in short yardage situations. Here we go......

Interesting Idea

Hmmm, maybe Steel City Slant should add Dog and While as unedited posters? More content and maybe we could push the readership up over 35. Thoughts?
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Dear Pittgirl,

Heavy Sigh. Curse the person that did this to us......and may their eyes be pecked dry by rabid pigeons.

Are The Pots All Broken

Testing another post with the phone. I wanted to try one with both an image and text. I went to a sushi place for lunch on Friday and this is how they served the tea.
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Beware The Zebra

Wow. That was a close one. That's the kind of close game that we needed to win as we head towards Thanksgiving - the day The Dog calls....reckoning day. The zebras were not kind to us today. Not one bit. No Sir. Not even a little. Not much to say about this week, just some random thoughts. Hines' clip doesn't make sense to me. He has to know he's going to get that flag. After the jaw-breaking incident, you know they are watching his every move when he's blocking. I know a few weeks ago I opined about The Dumptruck catching kickoffs too high and it scared me. A week after I said that he put one on the carpet after doing exactly that. Now he's gone. We won't miss him. I only bring that up because while I think Hartwig is a major upgrade over Sean Mahan - I'm scared to death that he's going to send a shotgun snap over Ben's head at some cruicial point in a game. I'm going to guess that he didn't use the gun much in his past life. Ben always seems to be reaching up for those snaps. Always. Mark my words! Our 3rd and short package stinks right now. Again, I agree with Dog, in the red zone, we may need to start throwing there to stop people from stacking the inside. Either that, or talk Bettis out of retirement. It was about the same type of situation on their march to the Super Bowl when The Bus ran over Brian Urlacher for a key TD. Same type of weather although it snowed a lot more that day. Moore got stuffed like a Thanksgiving Day turkey. The only things missing were mashed potatos and gravy. Not the jarred kind either, real gravy. Ben was sharp the entire game. He had zip when he needed it. I still don't think he needed to sit last week. Last week, he just needed his judgement questioned and a better game called for him. Isn't Troy fun to watch once he has the ball? He's hilarious....all herky-jerky.

Christmas Comes Early As Rooneys Keep Steelers

Finally, some good news. Looks like it will be "The Steeler Way" for the foreseeable future. Thank God I can keep watching football.

Slanted Captions: Lions

"Ummmm, No mom, I didn't see the neighbor's poodle. Frankie, did you see the neighbor's poodle?"

Slanted Captions: Polar Bears

Herb: "Wait, was that Right-Right-Left or Right-Left-Right?"
Maude: "Jesus Herb, It's Right-Right-Left....and stay off my paws!"
Herb (Under Breath): "I'm going to kill the bastards that green-lit Dancing With The Stars"

Blog From The Phone

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Gift Cards For Rebates

I hate companies. Well, most companies. I'm a capitalist at heart and want to like them, but when they abuse or try to scam their own customers, it pisses me off. Who am I currently mad at? Verizon, for one. I am typically a Verizon supporter. I have FiOS internet, FiOS land line, FiOS tv and 2 Verizon wireless phones. Why am I fired up? They tried to get me! Honest. I finally put my Razr (I miss you Razr!) to rest. I had it for close to 4 years and I loved it. It was time. I needed Qwerty. I text and email more than ever on my phone any I couldn't keep doing it with 9 number keys. So, on my new phone I got a $70 rebate. First of all, I HATE rebates. Just make the ffing thing cheaper by $70! Why the rebate? Because they know that a certain percentage of buyers will lose their receipt or completely forget to mail it in. I mailed mine in the day after I bought it. Well, they tried to trump me. Instead of sending a $70 check, they sent a $70 VISA gift card. Why is that trying to screw me? Because again, you cash a check, but you might not use a gift card. You might put it somewhere and forget it. More importantly to them, you might use it for a $48 purchase and then forget about it with $22 left on it....or even $2. Anything less than $70 is a bonus for them. I hate it. I hate the entire idea. The other one? I had PC issues recently and I was on a site to stress the CPU to see what speed it was really running at. While there I saw a tool that I wanted to buy for my machine. It was $29 and change. There was another tool you could add for $9.95 if you bought the original tool. When the buy screen came up, the original tool was the only one checked (from what I could see). I clicked buy and the total was close to $40. I couldn't believe it. When I scrolled back up on that page, they had an anchor put in for the spot on the page that would only show the original tool checked. If you went up a little farther, there was another button that was prechecked for "Add the other tool for only $9.95". Can you believe that? I immediately sent them a nasty email to cancel the order. Get this. To cancel, you have to go to another website that they give the link for. From there, you fill it out and then it takes about a week to get an RMA number. When you get THAT, you have to email their customer service department with the RMA and your user/password. I can't wait to see how many days it takes before it's off my credit card. What a crooked ass company that is. Once I get my money back, I'll post again with the name of the company.

Hey Colts, Here Ya Go

Well, Benny served up today's game on a silver platter. There is no other way to describe it. Without those two picks, and a lucky ass tip (two for that matter) the Colts may not have been in the end zone all day. The defense has to be really frustrated. They easily played well enough to win. Even though my team lost, I have to say, the most troubling thing about today for me was seeing Boomer Esiason for the first time in a long time. I'm trying to watch less and less panel shows and updates and I've been doing OK so far this year. I've added a lot of free hours (well, not really) to my Sundays by only watching a little of the Football Night in America show. I didn't even watch it tonight. However, when I turned on the HiDef to watch the Stillers, I turned it on a few minutes early and Boomer looked as if he swallowed a small child earlier today. His face is so bloated! What the heck? His head looked like a pumpkin for Christ's sake. I hope he's healthy and I'm not making fun of a medical condition. I guess that's what old age does to you. He looks like shit.

Fast Willie?

Is anyone else getting tired of waiting for "Fast Willie" to be healthy? I think his new nickname should be "Last" Willie....as in how long will he last this time.

Weiners and Bergers

Ok, so as it turns out, we're going to be alright. I don't see a scenario where the Steelers don't make the playoffs, but I've been wrong before......once. And we all know I hate 99% of NFL talking heads (could Clayton be the exception?) so I didn't even turn on my TV until 8:00 PM on Monday night, and that's because I thought the game started at 8:15. As the roundtable started talking about Ben and the number of times he's been hit this year, Cris Carter opened his big, stupid mouth. He started talking about Ben and how he's been dinged the past couple of years and how they gave him $100 million and his shelf life might be short because if the beating he takes. More on that after this..... He then said he misses a couple of games per year and if he misses 3 games a year over 10 years that's 30 games. Wow. Good job, Einstein. Except you might want to check your facts. Any idiot listening to this drivel now thinks Ben misses 3 games per year. A quick glance at nfl.com is all it takes to see that he has missed exactly 0, 4, 1, 1 and 0 games due to injury in his 5 seasons so far. Six games out of 4.5 seasons is ridiculous in today's day and age. Which brings me back to the other point I wanted to make. Yes, the Eagles and Giants combined for 13 sacks. I'm guessing 3 of them hurt. No "bone crushers". I can't remember him getting rocked to the point where his head snapped violently more than once. This isn't Jeff George getting sacked repeatedly, this is a freaking monster. He also saod that he's been hit from the blind side a lot this year. What? Do they have editors who watch this stuff and report back to them like ESPN used to have "Stat Boy" on PTI? Rarely has he been sacked without seeing the guy coming. It's usually a guy coming free off of a scheme right in his face.....and he usually eludes the first player and then gets hit because he refuses to take a sack. And I use "hit" reluctantly because he usually just gets wrapped up and tackled. The only other point I wanted to make on the game was the sheer numbers Steeler Nation brought forth. Holy God did Daniel Snyder have to shit a brick when he saw that. Especially considering many were in the good seats! Redskins fans must really suck to sell their tickets with a team doing well. What a bunch of losers. If that game was at Heinz, there may have been 1,000 people dressed in red, probably less. I once went to a Houston Oilers game at Three Rivers and I swear to God I saw exactly two Oilers fans. Two. That is not a lie. 2.

Thug Life

A great time was had Saturday night at the Halloween party we went to. The whole family was invited. Mom as a witch. Daughter as a candy corn witch....and me as a thug rapper, complete with a grill held in place with Fixadent. Weird going to CVS and buying Fixadent, but whatever. I tried walking around Friday night with my candy corn witch using bubble gum to hold the grill in place, but it didn't work out so well. Eating was a chore so I took them out for about an hour, but it just wasn't as funny without them so I quickly put them back in. At the party we had Darth Vader, Princess Leia (a dude), Uncle Fester, Indy Jones, Amy Winehouse and a host of other characters. Speaking of hosts, the host had a hay ride for the kids using "Big Red" his huge tractor that pulled me out of a mess a few years ago when I got one of his go-carts stuck in the mud. The house was full of fog and there were 2 fires outside. Didn't want to leave but had a swim meet at 7:00 AM on Sunday.

Zack and Miri Make A Porno

So my wife had hot food for a bunch of the neighbors last night as the kids Trick-or-Treated around the 'hood. I went around as the extra candy transporter dressed as a thug rapper complete with gold grill. In the back of my head I wanted everyone gone early as I had a plan for the night....go see the 10:05 Zack and Miri Make A Porno. It's been kind of a tradition with me over the years to see new Kevin Smith movies the night they come out. I've seen the last 4 or 5 in that manner. I have to say, it wasn't as good as I thought it would be. Maybe I've come to expect too much. Maybe it's because as a 39-year-old I don't talk the same way as the younger generation any more. Don't get me wrong, I can curse with the best of them, but I can also string sentences together without swearing even when I'm with my friends sans the wives. Trust me, the language didn't didn't bother me, it's part of why I like KS, but maybe I'm expecting him to age with me in some manner. My issues were more with the story. Like, I don' believe Zack would clean out his half of the apartment and bolt like he did. How do you know someone since 1st grade and live with them forever and then just leave like that and not talk for 3 months? I also thought the arguement between them before Miri was to shoot with Lester was too brutal....but whatever. It's not that I didn't like it because I did. It's just that I thought a few things didn't add up. Traci Lords looks horrible. Zacks friend was like a poor man's Bernie Mac. I'm not sure why I had to keep seeing Mewe's naked ass and then full frontal nudity at the end. Why was that necessary? The same point could have been made if he was in his boxers. I just hope, I really hope, that those scenes were written that way because it's how Smith feels it would have happened....not because he was trying to shock. I've always enjoyed KS's movies because it's real dialogue. It's how my friends and I used to talk and to some degree still do talk. I'd like to think his writing still flows naturally, not that he's wondering for a week if we need to see Mewes' junk. I did love all the local references to Monroeville and Pittsburgh. There was much love for the Penguins and Steelers in the flick. If I'm going to be honest, I have to give the movie a good solid 7. I just saw Knocked Up again for the third time and it's a good mile better than Z&MMAP. Where does it rank to me in KS's world?

1. Chasing Amy
2. Clerks
3. Dogma
4. Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back
5. Clerks II
6. Zack and Miri Make A Porno
7. Jersey Girl
8. Mallrats

Phillies

I used to be the commissioner of a Rotisserie baseball league in college. I was a baseball freak. I collected cards. I owned APBA. During the 1993 season when the Phillies went to the World Series I went to at least 10 games that year. I've been a Phillies fan since 1980 or so. I've been to Camden Yards and Fenway. For God's sake I used to sit on the can as a kid and read the baseball section of The Guinness Book of World Records. I loved Mike Schmidt growing up even though I was a die hard Steelers fan. Why does this matter? Well, the Phillies are about to be the World Champions and I can't even watch a complete game. I haven't watched one yet! Not against the Brewers, Dodgers or Rays. I watched most of some, 3 innings of a few before falling asleep on the couch. I even changed the channel on Sunday to watch True Blood and Entourage on HBO even though I could have DVR'd them. True Blood is starting to take the place of The Sopranos for me....filling a void of good television. Tonight's game will be easy to watch - maybe only 3 innings. You want to know why I love football so much? Just try to watch an entire baseball game. The strike lost me. I'm not back yet. If my own team in the World Series can't bring me back, I guess I never will be fully back in the fold.

Federal What? Teachers & Hospitals

If I just heard Barack Obama correctly in his infomercial, he said he was going to hire an army of teachers and raise current teacher's salaries. Hmmmm, I thought teachers were paid locally? I guess there are federal teachers. Then he talked about the money being spent in Iraq every month and asked a frenzied crowd if they knew how many schools and hospitals could be built here in the United States with that money. That is the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard. He's making it out like if the money wasn't being spent on the war, we'd be building hospitals with it. Excuse me? Again, does the federal government build hospitals in communities? If they do, I'm sorry I didn't know that. If they build schools, I'll say I'm sorry. If Obama saves the money in Iraq, he's going to spend it somewhere else, trust me. Maybe it will be spent on things you personally agree with and that's fine for you. I think it will be wasted, and that's my opinion, We'll see new social programs sprouting up like weeds in my garden. Say whatever you want to say, but please don't act like that money will be spent on things that it won't.

Wind, Solar and BioFuel

I am so sick of hearing this line. Obama is talking about it in his infomercial. McCain says it as well, as has every person that has run for the Presidency since I can remember. We need to get off foreign oil and get on wind, solar and bio. When is it going to happen? It's like Jerry Lewis curing Muscular Dystrophy. Talk about it for 40 years and accomplish nothing.

Slanted Stuff Santonio Holmes and Reefer

I get mad at dip-shits. Really mad. Dude, smoke all the pot you want, I don't care....just don't do it in your moving vehicle. Now we go into the Giants game, a yardstick game, without arguably our most explosive player. Nice. Why these guys do this, I have no idea. Stupidity I guess. I wonder if Santonio knows who Bam Morris is? he of trunk laden with reefer. Santonio has a trunk of another nature I guess. One only need Google images to get that joke. Dude, if you mess up you will be out of Pittsburgh......but then Dallas will sign you so I guess it doesn't matter.

Peyton manning had staph....ouch! That's what ended my favorite Steeler of All-Time's career....Greg Lloyd. Staph is nothing to mess around with. I think they should just cut off his leg.

The Ravens are a bunch of classless thugs. Classless. Class-less. Suggs used the word "bounty" in a radio interview. I can't wait until the next game. I guess they are fine with losing and "acting" tough.

Plaxbacks - I keep having them. Santonio should follow those stories as well.

They Are Who We Thought They Were

Wow. I mean I expected to win, but geez. The Bengals are in complete disarray. They need to fire several people and I fear the head coach might be one of them. Maybe he can come back to Pittsburgh if LeBeau retires anytime soon. Some random thoughts from the game:

When the announcers said at the very beginning of the game that the fumbled snap was a product of the bye week, I say patooties. They still practiced the entire week leading up to the game. They are professionals. They've been snapping and accepting snaps for a long time.

When the announcers said Bruce Arians' offense has evolved, I was thinking, "evolved into what exactly?" I love how they wait for a 39 yard play before they say that. If Hines is tackled right after the catch, does he make the same comment?

I forget who said it, but after an immediate hit of a returner by Ryan Clark, the one announcer made a comment about the Steelers always being good in the kicking game. Huh? What? Are you shitting me? Has he watched this team the last 4 years, cause I have. This is the first year in a long time that I haven't been holding my breath on every kick...and I'm not completely past it yet.

Najeh makes me nervous catching kickoffs. Do you see how high he catches it before tucking it away?

That rookie Rivers got welcomed to the NFL bigtime courtesy of Hines Ward. He'll never do that again without looking around. I think having Hines out there is enough to make those guys nervous on plays like that.

It took 5 guys to tackle Heath Miller. I think Heath and Spaeth are the best 1-2 TE combination in the league. Also, if that announcer said "Two Tights" one more time I was going to throw something through my new TV.

Mewelde Moore may be the free agent pickup of the year for any team in the league. had they not signed him, where would we be?

I've seen maybe 20 games where Leftwich has QB'd. Has he always had that big and slow of a windup, or was it more pronounced today?

Did you see Carson Palmer on the sidelines? He's a young man and he already looks like a 45-year old science teacher. He's like Phil Mickelson. When Phil was 27 he looked 40. Damn! As I get closer to 40 I pay a lot of attention to those things!

I've Seen The Movie, Kerry Collins

...and I know how it ends. The idiot talking heads and writing heads have no idea what to discuss. They talk about the Titans and their chances of going undefeated......which is laughable. They praise Kerry Collins and talk about him like he's the Messiah. Listen people, I don't give a flying fig newton is the Titans go 14-2. What I do know is this - at some point in a playoff game, Mr. Collins will shrink at the opportunity and throw 3 or 4 picks and lose the game. Write it down.

Fast Food Slant

So I worked from home today. Busier than if I was in the office, but with fewer interruptions. At lunch I took my shirts to the cleaners and planned on driving thru at Mickey D's and picking up some grub. The girl at the cleaners mentioned that she usually doesn't see me during the week. I told her my plan for the day and what I was doing for lunch. It was at that point that she told me she was in school to be a nutritionist. Then came the pain.... You know what? I'm a pretty smart guy, I know McD's isn't the healthiest stuff on the planet. I accept that. As long as I'm accepting that, I'd like to accept any other challenge from guys my age who don't eat at McD's to put their blood pressure, blood work, or anything else up against mine. I also saw Fast Food Nation was on a movie channel last weekend. I could only watch five minutes of it, because I just don't care. Still A Sis really doesn't even need to comment on this one because I know how she rolls. There are those out there that truly believe if you read the book Fast Food Nation you won't go to McDonald's any longer. Well, I have a half mile commute or less...and a hankering for some fried moo flesh and a shake (made out of what, I don't even know). You see, it is my belief that the folks who feel that way, must think that when they go to an Outback, T.G.I Fridays or even a Ruth Chris'......that those cows must have access to jacuzzis, massages, Euro shampoos and all the grilled salmon they can eat. When it's their "time", they are lead into a bedroom covered with rose petals and candles where they are blindfolded and moosturbated to death by an exterminator of the opposite sex. No. Stop it! You're kidding yourself. They are in a line, right next to the dude holding a one way plane ticket to McDonald Land. See, I don't care how the cow was killed. When it comes to my food which I so enjoy, it's all about the destination, not the journey. To get an original Chic-Fil-A sandwich, if you have to hang a cute little chickie upside down on a live battery cable while spraying it with water...I'm OK with that. I don't want to be there. I don't want to flip the switch to move the line. But I can accept that that's how I'm getting my chicken sambo. If there is a more humane way to slaughter the amount of cows needed to fill our fast food places, by all means do it and sell them at "Humane Hamburgers" and charge $1 more for them. Me? I'm going to McDonald's.

2008 Philly Distance Run

While I attempted to give the photographer a peace sign while passing him, little did I know it would make me look like I was carrying a torch that resembled a stop light! See how there are no runners around me in this photo? It's a strategy of mine. Fall waaaaay to the back of the pack so that it's so thinned out you can get a really good professional picture taken. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Jambalaya <> Running

If you run...especially early in the morning....you have to be cognizant of what you eat the night before. Several times I've had too many beers and ended up burping my way around Peace Valley Park - my Sunday running destination. One of my daughter's friends had her over Saturday so Still A Wife and I decided to go out to a real restaurant which we rarely do these days. We chose Marsha Brown's in New Hope PA as I've been wanting to eat there for a while now. It's in a converted church on the main drag and it's menu is Creole/Southern. We split a bottle of wine and I had the Jambalaya - thinking it wouldn't bother me the next day if I drank a lot of water and/or milk when I got home. Wrong! I had heartburn the entire night and could still taste the spicy concoction when I woke up to run this morning. The only thing that made the run better was the serenity at the lake. While I was training for the half marathon I was getting to the lake at 6:00 AM and starting my runs just as you could see the trail to follow. The temperatures were between 60-67 and the coldest morning was like 57 when I left my car. That was only a few short weeks ago. Today, I didn't get there until 7 as daylight has been changing - and it was only 39 stinking degrees when I left the house. I still wore shorts and just a long sleeve running shirt, but I did wear thin running gloves for the entire run. It seemed weird to even think about taking them this morning, but seeing a 3 and a 9 and it's not 93 will do that to you. When I got back to the car it was still only 46 but that 7 degrees made quite a difference. The fog coming off the lake was really thick as well. It was cool when the sun hit it just right after coming up. Runners and bikers coming in the opposite direction were almost right on top of you before you could see them. You know...if you were a big chicken (not me of course), you could allow your mind to play tricks on you ...thinking something totally evil could leap out of the fog at you before you could defend yourself......like a vampire....Bigfoot....Hilary Clinton......(shudders)...

30,000 Hits

The Slant's 30,000th hit came tonight. Oddly enough, it was a visitor from Japan and they landed here from a Google search of "Roy Gerela's Gorillas Picture". Sorry that you didn't find what you were looking for, and I couldn't find a photo of the sign either....but I remember it well dangling from the bleachers at Three Rivers Stadium. I bet if we ask Still A Dog, he'll be able to tell us something about Roy Gerela that we didn't know. On a somewhat different subject - a former Steeler from the 1940's that my dad knows from working at the same place recently passed away...Garry Feniello. I was lucky enough to get his autograph signed on the Steelers logo a few years ago. I would assume it's pretty rare. I met him a few years ago after eating breakfast at one of his haunts. Still A Dad took me over and introduced me to him. RIP.

Steelers - Jags Guest Post : The Dog Weighs In

Game Recap By Still A Dog:

Big Ben gave us a gutsy 300-yard, 3 TD performance. James "Silverback" Harrison and LaMarr Woodley caved in the Jags pocket in a classic pinser movement. But as I reflect on last night's win in Jacksonville it's the unsung and taken for granted players that made it happen for us.

To start, those guys are Aaron Smith, Darnell Stapleton, and Chris Hoke. Linemen all. You all will remember how our defense crumbled when Smith did not play at the end of last season. And last night you saw how effective Dick LeBeau's defense can be when Aaron Smith comes to work and does his job. Everything Le Beau does with his safeties and linebackers is predicated on rock solid line play. If the line play is weak, all his fancy schemes and stunts are just French pastry.

And that leads me to the next guy who is taken for granted, Chris Hoke. Hoke has filled in time and again for Fat Casey Hampton. When Fat Casey is out of breath Hoke comes in, when Fat Casey is hurt, Hoke comes in, when Fat Casey is in Tomlin's doghouse, Hoke comes in. And in the last two weeks Hoke has more than filled in for Casey Hampton. He has clogged the middle AND made plays in run stop and pass rush that I dare say I haven't seen Hampton make recently. So if strong line play is essential to Le Beau's defense it is Hoke and Smith that are the reason the talking heads are telling you what a great tackler Troy Polamalu is. I don't even think Troy's the best tackler on this defense let alone the NFL. But John Madden (once a Raider always a Raider) is just a windbag anyway. Hoke and Smith do give us the ability to play Polamalu in some unusual situations that an offense is not prepared for.

And on offense, Darnell Stapleton. I watched his play carefully last night and he is better than Kendall Simmons hands down. Why this man was riding the bench when that putrid Simmons started the first 3 games, I'll never know. But I was very pleased with Stapelton's play. He sealed the lane twice which sprung Mewelde Moore on long runs. And it was not his man that got to Big Ben, not once that I saw. And speaking of other things offensive line related that I don't understand, when Marvel Smith went out why did Trai Essex come in? I thought for sure we'd see Max Starks at LT. He finished the season there last year and did a decent job. We pay the man 7 million dollars but we never see him except as a Tight End in the goal line jumbo package? Have we not all seen enough of Starks and Essex to know which is the better Tackle??

I'm starting to take Jeff Reed for granted too. But those who have lived with lesser kickers know how many gray hairs those guys can put on your head... right Still A. Dad? Reed has simply become "money" on his kicks. It's easy to take him for granted but he is mucho important to this teams success.

And finally, a big hats off to Still A Fan for gushing over the signing of Mewelde Moore. He was so excited when we got that guy I was dumbfounded. I knew very little of Moore's work in Minnesota and did not see a great deal of value in the signing. Yes, we definitely needed a punt returner. But I did not see the man running the ball from scrimmage much. On punt returns, I was happy to just see Moore able to catch the ball which was an improvement over the last couple years of special teams play. But I had no idea he'd do so well as a pass catcher and runner out of the backfield! He is a "shifty" back. Where Willie Parker relies on pure speed, Moore has more moves than a pole dancer in Vegas. Combined with Parker for speed, and Dump Truck (in lieu of Mendenhall) for power, he is a great compliment RB to have. And Fan was justified in his exhuberance at the signing.

No bitching about Arians this week. Makes me wonder how much input Roethlisberger had in the play calling. I venture that Big Ben called a lot more of the game than we know and than we've seen to date.

We got a bye week now which we desperately need at this stage of the game. I hope everybody heals up and we can make a run from here. I am very pleasantly surprised at the team so far. As with everything else, time will tell.

Career Politicians

Isn't it funny how people talk about career politicians. I hate them. I don't trust them. Even if most of their beliefs align with mine, I still think they're mostly skeevy. So, leading up to this presidential election, there has been a lot of talk at my office about politics. I hate talking about politics at work and only offer up points of view if directly asked and only if it's somebody I feel like sharing with. Before either candidate picked their running mate, I had tons of these people agreeing with me that career politicians suck and we need new blood in most offices and seats so that favors don't need to be paid back. "Hell yeah" is the rallying cry. So, the second Palin is announced.....she doesn't have enough experience. Well, she hasn't been in politics too long and look what she's accomplished. I wonder if she was a man if the subject would even be brought up? Joe Biden himself said when John Kerry ran for preident..."he should pick John McCain to run with him". Sounds like a good enough endorsement to me.

Career Leaders

Wow! A story about our own little Benny. Looks like he's growing up just fine. Now, if we can just protect him long enough to have a 10 year career.

Guest Post: Still A Dog on the Ravens

I am really under time stress these days. My "real" job is getting more involved as I asked to be on a high profile project and now it may be too "high profile". Winter swim started tonight and there is practice 4 nights a week and meets on the weekend. I'm trying to launch another website experiment to make money and I've promised a swim movie documentary for summer league and I'm way late with it. Doesn't help that I fried my motherboard the other night. Sigh. Anyway, without his permission, here is Still A Dog's take on the game from an email he sent me earlier today. I don't disagree with a single item.

Soon as Kendall Simmons left the game, the O-line improved. Or was that just a coincidence that around the same time Big Ben went no-huddle and took that f*-head Arians out of the play calling? Hoke did a nice job in for Fat Casey. Silverback is a BEAST especially on Monday Nights and especially against the Ravens. LaMarr Woodley is working his way into being a premier linebacker. What year are the Ravens going to learn that Hines Ward baits them into stupid penalties? He's been doing it for ten years now and they never seem to learn. Terrell Suggs was quoted in the paper this morning saying "They (Steelers) always seem to count on the Ravens doing something stupid." Bottom line: We got to dump Arians ASAP. At least do what the Browns had sense enough to do and take the play calling away from him. WTF? Johnny Unitas called his own plays, Bonehead Terry Bradshaw called his own plays, I think Ben is at a point where he should call our plays. Like I posted on the blog, go out to the Highland Park Zoo and grap a chimp out of his cage to call plays. Anything is better than that filthy c*cks*cker Arians.

Thanks Dog, very enlightening. Sorry I had to edit you a little.....

Still A Dog Posse Member?

Hmmm, this guy looks like he might be part of the Still A Dog posse. Did you used to party with this guy back in the 70's? Actually, if Moe The Dog is out there....there is a part of this video that reminds me of Big Pimpin' W. He used to do Mick Jagger impersonations at the bar and they would put signs up saying he was performing that night. Yup.....Big Pimpin' W did that back in the day.

Dads 1, Shitheads 0

I love this kind of stuff. Not like....love this kind of stuff. I mean I really, really like it. I don't feel bad for him not one bit. Not even a little. Nope. Seriously. I hope what really happened is that he choked him out while the guy was looking at him and he could watch him die. Mother Hubbard had it coming. Maybe instead of security system signs on doors and windows you could just post this story. I have a 3 Iron bedside and the guy's own mother wouldn't be able to identify him if I caight him.